Government Access Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

97 Results for Government Access

View 11 - 20 results for government access comic strips. Discover the best "Government Access" comics from Dilbert.com.

Our Api

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Our Api - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hackers, #hacking, #api, #jargon, #obliviousness, #language

View Transcript

Transcript

Narrator: Dogbert The Reporter. Dogbert: How did hackers get access to your customer data? CEO: I'm told they used something called "our A.P.I." to suck out all the data. Dogbert: I'll just say you'er stupid. CEO: Why does everyone always say that?

View more books now

Backdoor Into Self Driving Car Code

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Backdoor Into Self Driving Car Code - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #government, #back door, #self driving, #software, #kill terrorits, #traitor, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Im uncomfortable with letting the government have a back door into our sled driving car software. The Boss: You worry too much, They'll only use it to kill terrorists and traitors. Dilbert: I think I might disable it and not tell them. The Boss: Traitor

Kill Code In Car

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Kill Code In Car - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #self-driving cars, #technology, #invention, #murder, #control, #government

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The government forced me to put a "kill code" in the operating system for our self-driving cars. Dogbert: And by "kill code," you mean it will bring the vehicle to a controlled stop? Dilbert: No, you're thinking of a "stop code."

Alice Says Dilbert Is Narcissistic

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Says Dilbert Is Narcissistic - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #honesty, #truth, #diagnosis, #Opinion, #free will, #ai, #artificial intelligence

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Dilbert's problem is that he's a huge narcissist. Robot: You are not qualified to make that diagnosis and you cannot detect his inner thoughts. Alice: Open your access panel so I can fix your stupid opinion. Robot: Are you saying I don't have free will?

The Cia Is Listening

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Cia Is Listening - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #speaker, #alexa, #google, #amazon, #spying, #surveillace, #paranoid, #privacy

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: Hello. I am a bluetooth speaker and your digital assistant. How may I help you? Man: Just shut up and sit there until I need something. Robot: Did you say" Give the CIA access to your microphone?" Man: Please, no. I'll do anything you want.

Drone Defense System

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Drone Defense System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #drone, #help, #rescue, #inept, #failure, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The government asked us to design a system to stop drone attacks on the homeland. The future of civilization is in our hands. Wally: I'm gonna miss civilization.

The Government Is Listening

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Government Is Listening - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #surveillance, #fbi, #privacy, #technology, #bug, #spying, #cell phone, #iphone, #apple

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The government asked me for an update on your project. Dilbert: I'll talk into your phone. They listen to you all day long. Boss: This is unsettling. Dilbert: Everything is on schedule!

For The Good Of The Country

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
For The Good Of The Country - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #apple, #iphone, #technology, #national security, #privacy, #terrorism, #encryption

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The government wants us to make software to crack our own encryption. Dilbert: That sounds evil. Boss: It's for the good of the country. Dilbert: Can I test it on your phone? Boss: You'd have to kill me first. Dilbert: That would be two good things for the country.

Government Wants Access To Data

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Government Wants Access To Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #national security, #privacy, #technology, #big business, #terrorism

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The government wants us to make software that can unlock the encrypted data of our users. Either we choose privacy or national security. Should we betray our customers or should we enable terrorists? Figure out which one is more profitable and get back to me. Boss: On it.

Whistleblower Laws

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Whistleblower Laws - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #law, #legal issues, #lawyer, #on the lam, #whistleblower, #technicality, #loophole, #legal

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I thought you were on the run from killing government agents. Dilbert: I only killed the bad ones. My lawyer says that's legal now under the whistleblower laws. [Earlier That Day] Dogbert: It was a tad aggressive, but I think you're fine.