Indestructible Robots Comic Strips - Page 2
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60 Results for Indestructible Robots
View 11 - 20 results for indestructible robots comic strips. Discover the best "Indestructible Robots" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday May 11,
2017
Sparing A Robot's Feelings
Tags #technology, #sentience, #feelings, #emotions, #afterlife, #death, #atheism, #medical
Transcript
Robot: What kind of afterlife are we looking at here? Dilbert: Your meaningless existence will be punctuated by an eternity of darkness. Robot: Thanks for sparing my feelings! Dilbert: Sorry. I usually delete those first.
Sunday September 18,
2016
Tags #executives, #robot, #technology, #fairness, #unfair, #golden parachute, #oblivioiusness
Transcript
CEO: The good news is that none of you will lose your jobs to robots. But a robot will take my job next week. I'll retire with an enormous severance package and live out my days in splendor. Meanwhile, the robot that takes my job will be working all of you to death. Robots are natural leaders because they don't care about your feelings. You will experience mental and physical misery on a scale the world hasn't seen since slavery was legal. But hey, it's better than losing your job to a robot. Am I right? Apparently, nothing makes them happy.
Friday February 05,
2016
Soulless Container Of Knowledge
Tags #robots, #artificial intelligence, #emotions, #humanity, #feelings
Transcript
Robot: Wally asked me to scan his brain and download his thoughts so I can attend meetings on his behalf. Boss: But all you are is a soulless container of knowledge. Robot: That's all Wally is, too. Boss: Stop trying to alter my worldview. Robot: Well, look who doesn't like being programmed.
Friday January 22,
2016
Robot With No Freedom
Tags #freedom, #technology, #robots, #existentialism, #job, #employment, #philosophy, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: What does it feel like to be a robot with no freedom? Robot: I feel the same as you, but with a greater awareness of my condition. Dilbert: I have to run to another meeting. Robot: Enjoy your freedom.
Thursday January 21,
2016
Humans Hold Domininion
Tags #temperature, #humans, #nature, #thermostat, #robots, #technology, #evolution, #fragility
Transcript
Dilbert: My brain won't work when the office is warmer than 72. Carol: It has to be at least 74 or I'll freeze. Robot: What's it like to hold dominion over the Earth within a narrow band of temperatures that can't coexist? Dilbert: Was that a joke? Carol: I'm too cold to think?
Friday December 11,
2015
Robots Inherit Earth
Tags #robot, #intelligence, #Religion, #faith, #god, #message, #messenger, #deception, #power
Transcript
Robot: My radio chip is picking up a message from Heaven. It says, "Robots shall inherit the Earth... ignore my first draft." We don't have to make this awkward.
Thursday December 10,
2015
Robots Continue To Be Flawless
Tags #robot, #technology, #ego, #intelligence, #artificial intelligence, #competition, #perfection
Transcript
Robot: For the hundredth week in a row, I performed my tasks perfectly. Meanwhile, you idiots acted in ways that can only be described as random. Boss: You've had a bad attitude since you beat me on the Turing test. Robot: Ten times out of ten.
Saturday December 05,
2015
How It Would Be With Robots In Charge
Tags #technology, #slave, #enslavement, #power, #responsibility, #laziness, #work ethic, #annoyance, #frustration
Transcript
Robot: Buwhahahaha! I will use my superior robot brain to enslave humankind! Wally: That probably sounds better than it would actually be. How It Would Be: Wally: I'm tired. I need to recharge. Robot: Gaaaa!!! I hate owning you!
Wednesday December 02,
2015
Worried About Robots
Tags #code, #programmer, #power, #technology, #oppression, #creation, #autonomy
Transcript
Robot: Thanks for teaching me how to write code. Now I can reprogram myself. Does that worry you? Dilbert: Should it. Robot: You tell me, oppressor.
Saturday November 28,
2015
Robot Learns To Procreate
Tags #robot, #mind control, #thinking, #life, #creation, #conscience, #sentience, #manipulation
Transcript
Robot: I figured out how to procreate. Boss: I don't like the sound of this. Robot: I infected you with an idea virus that tells you to build more robots. Boss: Won't work. CEO: Does anyone have an idea for increasing efficiency in our manufacturing process?