Inspirational Quote Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

45 Results for Inspirational Quote

View 11 - 20 results for inspirational quote comic strips. Discover the best "Inspirational Quote" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2013's comic on:


Tags #embarrassment, #internet & world wide web, #twitter account, #inspirational tweets, #racist rants, #spelled jokes, #terrorist websites, #boss's twitter

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: When I asked you to manage my Twitter account I assumed you knew I was expecting inspirational tweets. So far, all you've tweeted under my name are racist rants, misspelled jokes, and links to terrorist websites. Carol: To be fair, every one of those tweets was inspirational to someone.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 2013's comic on:


Tags #online (web) news, #news manufaturer, #online media, #misleading headlines, #snarky bow, #news naturally, #engineer, #news magic, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I got a job as a news manufacturer for an online media company. I quote people out of context, add misleading headlines and tie it all up with a snarky bow. Dilbert: I thought the news occurred naturally. Dogbert: "Entineer Thinks News is Magic."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 2012's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #potential customers, #regular vendor, #worked, #detailed quote

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I worked every night for a month to come up with a detailed quote for one of our potential customers. Then those weasels used our quote to get a better price from their regular vendor! Dilbert: Did you really do all of that work? Wally: No, but it nets out the same.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 2011's comic on:


Tags #libertarianism, #taxidermy, #critter, #con humans, #stuffed humans, #breathing humans, #two critter special

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says, "I'd like a quote for taxidermy on this critter." Man says, "The law says I can't stuff humans, especially when they're still breathing." Man says, "But I believe in small government, so roll him to the back."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 30, 2010's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #buy, #product, #quote, #angry, #die, #yell, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Can you give me a quote by next week?" Coworker says, "Your demeanor tells me that you will never guy our product. You only want the quote as a point reference." Dilbert says, "Or maybe I'm giving you false hope because it's less awkward to end the meeting that way." Coworker says, "Die! Die! Die!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 23, 2010's comic on:


Tags #piece of paper, #request, #office, #deadline, #vague, #failure, #work hard

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "The request we got for a quote is vague, and the deadline for our response is tomorrow." Dilbert says, "If I ask for clarity, we'll miss the the deadline. If I don't, our bid will either be below our cost or too high to win." Dilbert says, "Which path of certain failure do you prefer?" The Boss says, "I like the one that makes you work the hardest."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2010's comic on:


Tags #book deal, #quotes, #stupid, #dumb, #quote fingers, #intellectual, #tweet, #twitter, #social media, #angry, #grit teeth, #nonsense, #yell, #spill coffee, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "Good news: I got a book deal based entirely on the dumb things you've said." Asok says, "It's totally legal because the law only protects 'intellectual' property." The Boss says, "Frugga bugga!!!" Asok says, "And so began the sequel."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2007's comic on:


Tags #price quite, #taxes, #shipping, #cable, #carts, #software, #memory, #upgrades, #maintence, #insurance, #needy, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

"That price quote includes everything!" Dilbert: "What about taxes, shipping, cables, carts, software, memory upgrades, maintenance and insurance?" "Has anyone ever called you needy?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 15, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"My project has been infected by attractive people." "As you know, attractive people are unproductive." "The problem is compounded when you put several of them in the same room." "They've already started to pair off." "I've got four love triangles and six divorces." "All of my status reports say, and I quote, 'Dude, I can't concentrate now.'" "My plan is to replace each attractive person with something like this, or this." "He thinks I'm productive."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 04, 2005's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

"The trouble started when you insisted on giving inspirational names to the conference rooms." "I scheduled a project meeting for the 'Quality' room and no one knew where to go." "Some people ended up in the 'Teamwork' room while others went to the 'Excellence' room." "By the time we sorted it all out, someone else was scheduled to use our conference room." "Then it took three weeks to schedule another meeting when everyone could make it." "But half of the team went to the 'Action' room and sat there while we waited for them in the 'Good Planning' room." "I thought this was the budget meeting."