Quit Without Notice Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

407 Results for Quit Without Notice

View 11 - 20 results for quit without notice comic strips. Discover the best "Quit Without Notice" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2019's comic on:

Tags #argument, #boss, #business, #change, #frustration, #managers & supervisors, #money, #salary, #company

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't give you a raise because you didn't accomplish anything this year. Dilbert: Are you insane? I completely redesigned our line of products!!! Boss: That was mostly last year. Dilbert: You didn't give me a raise last year because I wasn't finished until January of this year. Now you aren't giving me a raise this year because I did most of the work last year. Give me one reason I shouldn't quit right now! Boss: Because every other company is just as bad. And you don't like change. Dilbert: I said one reason!

Self Driving Car

Thank you for voting.
Self Driving Car - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 2019's comic on:

Tags #automobile driving, #cars, #intelligence, #technology, #creepy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My self-driving car quit on me. Wally: You mean it broke down? Dilbert: No, I mean it left a note and drove away. Wally: Did you wax it enough? Dilbert: I tried, but it kept moaning in a creepy way.

Company Cheer

Thank you for voting.
Company Cheer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 2018's comic on:

Tags #boss, #business, #employees, #jobs, #managers & supervisors, #meetings, #corporations

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our new corporate owners want us to gather every morning to do the company cheer. Alice: I quit. Dilbert: I quit. Voice: I quit. Voice 2: I quit. Boss: That's not the company cheer. Dilbert: It is now.

No Internet

Thank you for voting.
No Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 17, 2018's comic on:

Tags #business, #complaining, #engineering, #office workers, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The network will be down all day, but try to do what you can without it. Dilbert: What can we do without it besides drink coffee, complain, and whittle? Boss: No knives at work. Dilbert: Hold off on the whittling.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 2018's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #customer, #meeting, #engineers, #years, #disasters, #worry, #data, #centers, #blockchain

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Can I go with you to the customer meeting? I'm worried you might promise something we can't deliver. The Boss: Don't be ridiculous! I've been having customer meetings without engineers for years. Dilbert: I know and they all turn into disasters. The Boss: You worry too much! Everything will be fine! Man: Can you replace our data centers with blockchain? The Boss: Give us two days.

Dilbert Characters

Work Is Dehumanizing

Thank you for voting.
Work Is Dehumanizing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 25, 2018's comic on:

Tags #the boss, #man, #workplace, #dehumanizing, #Environment, #dignity, #name

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: This workplace is dehumanizing! I can no longer work in this environment! I refuse to allow any more assaults on my dignity. I quit! The Boss: And your name is...?

Dilbert Uses Bumper Sticker Wisdom

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Uses Bumper Sticker Wisdom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 24, 2018's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #permission, #bumper stickers, #forgive

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Dilbert, did you reconfigure the server without my permission? Dilbert: Let me consult my collection of bumper stickers for an answer. "It is easier to ask forgiveness than permission." The Boss: Okay, that sounds right.

New Military Project

Thank you for voting.
New Military Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 27, 2018's comic on:

Tags #name, #weapon, #semantics, #language

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: My staff is threatening to quit because of our military contracts. CEO: Tell them we only work on defensive weapons. Boss: It might help if we changed the project name from "City-killing Laser In Space." CEO: How about "Skylight?"

Motivational Speaker

Thank you for voting.
Motivational Speaker - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 01, 2018's comic on:

Tags #motivation, #motivational speaker, #inspiration, #backfire

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: The motivational speaker you hired was great!!! We all decided to quit out jobs and become motivational speakers. Boss: He was supposed to make you work harder here. Alice: You wanted him to motivate us to be dumb?

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 20, 2018's comic on:

Tags #intelligence, #aspirations, #relationships, #betterment, #warren buffett

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Warren Buffett says you should spent time with people who are better than you. Alice: Why would people who are better than me be dumb enough to spend time with me? Asok: Well... I assume you have to find people who are better than you, but not smart enough to avoid you. Because, obviously, you'd be bringing down the average of anyone who was better than you. Which reminds me, I need to cut this meeting short to keep my average up. Dilbert: Maybe we can continue the meeting without him. Alice: That would only be good for you. I need to find better people. Dilbert: The meeting went downhill from there. Dogbert: Can you wrap this up? You're bringing down my average.