Regular Salt Comic Strips - Page 2

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56 Results for Regular Salt

View 11 - 20 results for regular salt comic strips. Discover the best "Regular Salt" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2013's comic on:


Tags #hypocrisy, #respect, #succeed, #treat each other well, #video recording, #google glasses, #recording confidential info, #fired, #insulting, #final check, #name calling, #ironic

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CEO: We only succeed when we treat each other with respect. Are you video-recording me with those Google glasses? Dilbert: Huh? CEO: You're fired for recording a confidential meeting! Pack your bags, you worthless piece of garbage! I got your final check right here! Dilbert: These are my regular glasses. Having cleared that up, you were saying something about respect? CEO: Settle down, four-eyes. This isn't over.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 04, 2012's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #millennial employee, #bureacracy, #poor communication, #task force, #regular updates, #business

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Boss: Our millennial employees keep quitting because of our bureaucracy and poor communication. CEO: Form three task forces to look into it. But don't tell any of the task forces that there are two others doing the same thing. Boss: Should I give you regular updates? CEO: Nah.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 30, 2012's comic on:


Tags #controlling gaze, #lazy, #management experts, #managers & supervisors, #one on one meetings, #regular does, #theiveing, #underlings, #work ethic, #toxic saboteur, #business

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Boss: Management experts say bosses should have frequent one-on-one meeting with underlings. Apparently, you need regular doses of my controlling gaze to prevent you from evolving into a lazy, thieving, toxic saboteur. Carol: It's working great. So far I feel less lazy about doing the other things you mentioned.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 09, 2012's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #potential customers, #regular vendor, #worked, #detailed quote

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Wally: I worked every night for a month to come up with a detailed quote for one of our potential customers. Then those weasels used our quote to get a better price from their regular vendor! Dilbert: Did you really do all of that work? Wally: No, but it nets out the same.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 07, 2012's comic on:


Tags #recessions, #regular interns, #interns intern, #no pay, #semi relevant job experience, #slap you, #no reason, #stupid economy

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Boss: We don't have any openings for regular interns, but I can offer you a job as an intern to our intern. We won't pay you, of course, but you might acquire an imperceptible amount of semi-relevant job experience. And sometimes we'll slap you for no reason. Applicant: Stupid economy! I'll take it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 16, 2011's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #move to big building, #regular job, #so unimprotant, #won't be missed, #work on something, #month, #business

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The Boss says, "Tina, you'll be in charge of our move to the new building." Tina says, "That means you think my regular job is so unimportant that I won't be missed if I work on something else for a month." The Boss says, "If it makes you feel any better, this will take longer than a month."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2011's comic on:


Tags #new year resolutions, #dvr, #geeky science shows, #snore, #asthmatic cow, #impose resolutions, #habit chnagers, #behavior requests

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Dogbert: I made a list of demands for you new year's resolutions. Dilbert: Thous salt not fill up the DVR with geeky science shows. ....Thou shalt not snore like an asthmatic cow.... I didn't know other people could impose resolutions on me, Dogbert: Its a new thing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 2010's comic on:


Tags #train mailroom guy, #worthjless, #unimportant, #email, #shovel emails, #recycling bins, #clean desk

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The Boss says, "Wally, I need you to train the new mailroom guy." Wally says, "Why me?" The Boss says, "Because he's unimportant and you're worthless." Wally says, "Okay, I was worried that it was the other way around." Wally says, "All important messages are sent by e-mail." Wally says, "So your job is to shovel all of the regular mail into recycling bins." Wally says, "We won't be paying you, but you can use packages and tape to build your own igloo." Two weeks later The Boss says, "Why is my desk so clean?" Wally says, "You're welcome."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2010's comic on:


Tags #human resources, #ergonomics, #bad posture, #golem, #boneless chicken, #business

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Man says, "Hello, Wally. Human resources assigned me to be your ergo buddy." Wally says, "My what?" Man says, "I'll observe while you work. Then give you suggestions on improving your ergonomics." Man says, "Your posture is all wrong, and your keyboard needs to be lower." Man says, "Your bad ergonomic practices have turned you into a golem." Wally says, "Golem?" Man says, "It means a shapeless mass imbued with life. A lump. Clod, or fool." Man says, "It's right here on my checklist. After "Boneless chicken." Wally says, "Does that say you're supposed to pour salt on me until I dry up and die?" Man says, "Let's pretend you didn't see that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 30, 2009's comic on:


Tags #eating, #annoyed, #angry, #violence, #hitting, #punching, #arrogant

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The foodie with a huge forehead Man says, Mmmm, a pomme de terre frite with sea salt and just a hint of rosemary." Punch! Alice says, "That was a French Fry. And much like yourself, it was a salted."