Tech Platforms Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

164 Results for Tech Platforms

View 11 - 20 results for tech platforms comic strips. Discover the best "Tech Platforms" comics from Dilbert.com.

Tina Enters Coma

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Enters Coma - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #business, #technology, #write, #body, #language, #read

View Transcript

Transcript

tina the tech writer tina: in simple terms, tell me how the technology works, so i can write about it. one hour later dilbert pointing to flow chart: and that's how it all...uh-oh. if i am reading your body language correctly, you're saying i could have shortened that. continued...

Social Media Mind Control

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Social Media Mind Control - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #control, #social media, #selfie, #smartphone

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Are you worried that the algorithms used by social media platforms are a form of mind control? Boss: I...am not...worried about...that. Wally: Maybe we should have had this conversation sooner. Boss: Must...post...selfie...

New Statue In The Lobby

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
New Statue In The Lobby - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #alice, #the boss, #criminal, #tech support, #darned, #good, #report

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Where's the career criminal I hired to do tech support? He was last seen talking to you. Alice: Rumor has it that someone murdered him, covered him in with-out and tried to pass him off as a statue in the lobby. Dilbert: I would report this if it did't look so darned good here.

Criminal Does Tech Support

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Criminal Does Tech Support - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #market, #competitive, #career, #criminal, #internal, #tech support, #passwords, #software, #justice, #fist

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I know the job market is highly competitive, but was it really a good idea to hire a career criminal? The Boss: Relax. He's just doing internal tech support. Paul: I'll need all of your passwords to update your software. Alice: Have you met my fist of justice?

Can't Remember Wally's Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Can't Remember Wally's Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #language, #jargon, #obliviousness, #bluff, #managers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't remember what project you're working on. Wally: I'm integrating parallel platforms for load balancing across incremental networks. Boss: Keep doing that. I can never tell when I'm having a good day.

Let's Do The Meeting Later

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Let's Do The Meeting Later - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fitbit, #health, #monitor, #wearable tech, #surveillance

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: According to your employee health monitor, your lack of sleep last night is hampering your mental functions. Let's end the meeting and try again when your brain is working better. Man: I don't understand. Dilbert: That is consistent with the data.

Ted Might Drop Dead

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Might Drop Dead - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #wearable tech, #heart attack, #diseases, #death, #prediction, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, your performance is poor. I need to let you go. Ted: Is it a coincidence that you're firing me at the same time my employee health monitor detected cardiovascular disease? How good are the predictive analytics on this? Boss: Don't make lunch plans.

Work Until You Drop

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Work Until You Drop - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #energy, #surveillance, #wearable tech, #dedication, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your health tracker says you are leaving work at the end of each day with energy to spare. That's exactly like stealing from the company. Dilbert: You want me to work until I drop? Boss: I'm not allowed to say that directly.

Wally's Watch Is A Snitch

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Watch Is A Snitch - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wearable tech, #health, #surveillance, #fitbit, #monitor, #fitness, #attendance

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I can't come to work today. I'm totally sick. Boss: According to your employee health monitor, you're not sick at all. Wally: Stupid snitch!!!

Watch That Monitors Health

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Watch That Monitors Health - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #wearable tech, #fitbit, #fitness, #monitor, #surveillance

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our new product is a watch that monitors every aspect of your health. Wearing the watch is mandatory for all employees. Your data will automatically stream to our cloud storage. Voice: Because you care about our health? Boss: Sure. We'll go with that.