Violence Comic Strips - Page 2
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Character
47 Results for Violence
View 11 - 20 results for violence comic strips. Discover the best "Violence" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday March 07,
2015
Alice Is Highest Paid Engineer
Tags discrimination, money, salary, sexism, violence, wages, Women, highest paid, sciccors, mallet, reputation
Transcript
Alice: I'm the highest-paid engineer in the department now. Dilbert: Does it have anything to do with those scissors, the mallet, and your reputation for violence? Alice: Would you ask a man that question? Dilbert: Gaaa!!! It's like a super-power!
Thursday August 29,
2013
Tags coffee & tea, inventions, violence, garbage disposal, killed, murder, competetive
Transcript
Robot: Here is your coffee, as requested. Some guy tried to take the last cup, so I strangled him and put his remains down the garbage disposal. Wally: It's weird how that makes the coffee taste so much better.
Friday April 12,
2013
Tags anger, employees, violence, contradcited, meeting, fist of death, robots, no legal rights, cardio, oiled my pan, business
Transcript
Alice: You contradicted me in a meeting today and I didn't appreciate it. I'm no allowed to use my fist of death on humans, but you robots have no legal rights. It's not personal. This is how I get my cardio. Robot: I just oiled my pan.
Monday March 11,
2013
Tags fear, violence, inspection, elbonian facility, disputed territory, totalitarian state, north elbonia, forshadowing
Transcript
Boss: I need you to do a site inspection at our Elbonian facility. It's located in a disputed territory on the border of the totalitarian state of North Elbonia. Was that enough foreshadowing or should I say something about how they treat spies? Dilbert: No, you nailed it.
Monday December 05,
2011
Tags rebellions, riots, violence, rebel army, social justice, iron fisted dictator, billionaire, stain, tank tread, looting, excited animals
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm forming a rebel army. Ratbert: Count me in! What are we fighting for? Dogbert: You'll be fighting for social justice and I'll be scheming to become an iron-fisted dictator. In the long run, I'll be a billionaire and you'll be a stain on a tank tread. Ratbert: Please, please say there will be looting.
Monday September 26,
2011
Tags employees, violence, burt nount, started yesterday, sneezed away, business
Transcript
Man: Hi, my name is Burnt Nount. I started here yesterday. Alice: Sneeze coming. AAACHOOO!! I gotta warn you, they come in threes.
Sunday November 14,
2010
Tags email, angry, annoyed, memory, coworker, violence, slam face on smartphone, front of mind
Transcript
Alice says, "You didn't answer my e-mail." Coworker says, "I don't check e-mail often." Alice says, "The whole point of e-mail is that you check it often." Alice says, "Are you an idiot or some sort of digital sociopath?" Coworker says, "Sometimes I don't remember to check it." Alice says, "You seem like a visual learner, so let me show you how to keep e-mail in the front of your mind." Alice says, "Is this your smartphone?" Coworker says, "Yes." BAM! Alice says, "Now it's in the front of your mind. Get it?"
Monday December 14,
2009
Sunday September 20,
2009
Tags meeting, bleak, pessimistic, doom, beating, angry, economy, violence, business
Transcript
Strategy Meeting Man says, "The weak economy is limiting our strategic options." Man says, "I won't sugarcoat anything." Man says, "Option one is a long slide to oblivion." Oblivion Man says, "Option two is a death spiral." Man says, "Our new company logo is a man getting sucked into a toilet." Man says, "Our revised mission statememnt is 'Forage during daylight. Hide at night.'" Man says, "I'll pass out clubs, and you can decide among yourselves how to downsize by fifty percent." Wally says, "Is it just me or was it better when they sugarcoated?"


