Writing Materials Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

141 Results for Writing Materials

View 11 - 20 results for writing materials comic strips. Discover the best "Writing Materials" comics from Dilbert.com.

Doctor And Dopamine

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Doctor And Dopamine - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags addiction, impulse control, social media, twitter, facebook, pharmaceuticals, drugs, gambling, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: The MRI shows that your brain has been hijacked by dopamine pirates. You are now under the full control of social media corporations, gambling casinos, and big pharma. Boss: Are you writing me a prescription? Doctor: No, I'm buying stock in those companies.

Product Warning Is Too Long

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Product Warning Is Too Long - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technical writer, instructions, caution, warning, safety, criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: My boss, who knows nothing about technical writing, told me to cut my 700-page product warning down to 500 pages. He doesn't appreciate my art. Dilbert: Sounds like both of you are idiots. Tina: This will go smoother if you stop talking.

500 Pages Would Be Rubbish

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
500 Pages Would Be Rubbish - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags writing, criticism, technical writer, warning, caution, safety

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You need to edit the product warning from seven hundred pages down to one. Tina: Oh, that's rich. I'ma professional technical writer, and you're telling me how to write? Boss: Can you cut it down to 500 pages? Tina: Sure, if you want it to be total rubbish.

Product Warning Is Coming Along

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Product Warning Is Coming Along - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags user guide, safety, directions, overthinking, managers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Tina, have you finished writing the product safety warning? Tina: I'm on page 357 with no end in sight. Boss: Okay, keep up the good work. I probably should have done a little micromanaging there.

Ted Promoted To Software Architect

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Promoted To Software Architect - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags manager, Promotion, intelligence, logic, obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I promoted Ted to software architect because he doesn't know how to code. At first I thought it was a bad idea. Then I remembered that sometimes monkeys are astronauts. Dilbert: You know the monkeys don't fly the rocket, right? Boss: And Ted won't be writing code.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags tldr, email, communication, patience, criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Did you read my email? Dilbert: No, it was too long. Man: Maybe you could read it when you have more time. Dilbert: I never have time to read email messages that are too long. Maybe you could rewrite it to be shorter. Man: I don't have time to rewrite it. Dilbert: And I don't have time to read it. Man: If no one reads that email, it will mean I wasted two hours writing it. Dilbert: Plus, you're wasting my time right now. Don't forget to include that in your failure assessment. Man: I had high hopes for that email. Dilbert: It's a sunk cost. Let it go.

Tricky To Be An Optimist

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tricky To Be An Optimist - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee, conversation, glass

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Are you done writing the soft-ware? Wally: Yes, but it has some bugs. Boss: How is that different from not being done? Wally: I see the glass as half full. Boss: Half full of bugs? Wally: Optimism is tricky.

It Sounded Like Feng Shui

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
It Sounded Like Feng Shui - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, obliviousness, distraction, attention

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why haven't you finished writing the software? Dilbert: Because each of your interruptions took me out of the zone and turned a simple task into a nightmare. Catbert: What did he mean by that? Boss: It sounded like some sort of feng shui.

Programming Environment

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Programming Environment - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags productivity, programmer, engineer, developer, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you finish writing the software? Dilbert: No. I spent the last three days setting up my programming environment. Boss: So... you've done... nothing? Dilbert: Nothing you'd understand.

The Long Email

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Long Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags communication, laziness, email, tldr

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You never got back to me with your answer. Dilbert: Yes, I did. I spent three hours writing an email that tells you all you need to know. Boss: What did it say?