Zombie Apocalypse Comic Strips - Page 2

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35 Results for Zombie Apocalypse

View 11 - 20 results for zombie apocalypse comic strips. Discover the best "Zombie Apocalypse" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #afterlife, #death & dying, #zombie, #truth about afterlife, #projecting, #curiosity

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Wulf: I was Schrodinger's cat back in the day. That's why I'm alive and dead at the same time. I know the truth about the afterlife because my dead half told my living half all about it. Do you want to know what happens? Wally: Stop projecting your curiosity on me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cats & kittens, #physics, #famous physicist, #zombie

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Catbert: This is Wulf. He used to work for a famous physicist named Schrodinger. He escaped before the experiment was finished and now he's both alive and dead at the same time. Dilbert: Like a zombie? Catbert: Uh-oh. Wulf: Wow. I have half a mind to be offended by that.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job description, #mindless zombie, #team work, #wate time, #tasks, #waste time, #never shows intitaive

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Wally: Should I waste my time doing tasks that are not in my job description? Or should I be a mindless zombie that shuns teamwork and never shows initiative? Take your time. I'm good either way.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #obliviousness, #obstinacy, #office workers, #whiteboard, #conference room, #prohject timeline, #zombie reflex mode

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Dilbert: Don't clean the whiteboard in the conference room. It has my project timeline. Janitor: I can't promise that. I slip into a sort of zombie reflex mode when I do this job. Dilbert: I envy you. Janitor: Would you like a few minutes to say goodbye to your timeline?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #co worker, #tired, #dead, #died, #afterlife, #zombie, #alive again, #pictures in heaven, #eyes closed

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Topper Dilbert: I didn't get much sleep last night. Ted: That's nothing. I haven't slept in a month. Dilbert: Wouldn't that kill you? Ted: It did, but that's nothing. I spent a week in the afterlife, then I returned to this world as a zombie. I taught myself homeopathy and discovered a cure for zombies. Now I'm alive again. Please be done...Please be done...Please be done... I took pictures of heaven. Alice: Gaaa!!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"I heard that you're a certified project management zombie. Is that true?" "I'm an assertive and innovative professional, experienced in project and operations management methodology and process development." "He didn't seem dangerous." "I just sat through a three-hour project review meeting."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Certified Project Management Zombie "Let's review our assumptions, risks, and constraints." "Your project management style is putting my joi de vivre at risk." "It's funny because I don't have any."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #absorb project, #zombie employee, #flakey, #wide eyed, #not helpful

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The boss: Dilbert, you'll absorb bills project when he transfers. Dont worry, He'll tell you everything you need to know. The whatchamacallit has to be whatever or else the who sits will go hey hey. Now this is either the budget total or a fax number. Its absolutely critical that you....um...I lost my train of thought. Dilbert: do you have a list of key contacts? That would have been a good idea. Dilbert: Can I call you if I have questions? You can try. I love my coworkers, until they talk.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #customer visit, #zombie, #technical talk, #liberal arts major, #blue

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Customer Visit Dilbert: I can see form your zombie stare that you don't understand technical talk. Dilbert: Let me try iy in a language I call "liberal arts major" Dilbert: Its blue. Customer: It has a color??!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #downsized, #not one of them, #project cancelled, #wonder, #zombie, #offer to walk, #boos, #fired, #let go, #shock

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Dilbert is sitting in front of The Boss' desk. The Boss says, "Your project is cancelled. You'll be downsized in ninety days." The Boss continues, "Until then, feel free to wander around like a zombie." Dilbert walks past coworkers and thinks to himself, "I walk among them but I am not one of them."