Accept Some Resposibility Comic Strips - Page 2
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977 Results for Accept Some Resposibility
View 11 - 20 results for accept some resposibility comic strips. Discover the best "Accept Some Resposibility" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday March 04,
1990
Tags #dress, #flattery, #Dilbert, #dish, #cloth, #ordinary, #fashionable, #dropped, #jello, #shoes, #wipe, #up, #compliment, #gracefully
Transcript
Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert tells the woman, "I like your dress." He thinks, "Women love flattery." Dilbert says, "It reminds me of my favorite dish cloth." He thinks, "Uh-oh . . . Wrong thing to say." Dilbert says, "Of course, I'm not talking about an ORDINARY dish cloth." Dilbert thinks, "Dig, dig . . ." Dilbert continues, "I'm talking about a truly fashionable dish cloth here . . . In fact, if I dropped Jello on my shoes I'd leave it there all day rather than use your dress to wipe it up." The woman overturns the table, wraps the tablecloth around Dilbert's head and leaves. Dilbert lies on the floor and says, "Some women just don't know how to accept a compliment gracefully."
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Friday February 23,
1996
Tags #software, #under contract, #methodology, #village meetings, #juggle, #elbonians, #slam out code, #go roller skating, #pig, #animals, #engineering
Transcript
Dilbert perches on a rock using a laptop. He says to two Elbonians, "Before I accept the software you wrote under contract, tell me what development methodology you use." One Elbonian says, "We hold village meetings to boast of our skills and curse the devil-spawned end-users." The other Elbonian adds, "Sometimes we juggle." The first Elbonian continues, "At the last minute we slam out some code and go roller skating." Dilbert says, "I would find this humorous if not for the pig on my back." A pig clings to Dilbert lovingly.
Wednesday April 02,
1997
Tags #reduce expenses, #essentail jobs, #business cards, #borrow some
Transcript
The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "In order to reduce expenses, only the employees in essential jobs may have business cards." Wally, Dilbert and Alice think, "I'd better order some business cards to find out if I'm 'essential.'" The Boss says to his secretary, "Carol, order some new business cards for me." Carol replies, "Ooh. No can do. But you can borrow some of mine."
Saturday April 11,
1998
Tags #accept transfer, #frozen asteroid, #surplussed, #map
Transcript
Bob tells Alice, "If I don't accept the transfer to a frozen asteroid, I'll be superplugged." Alice says, "Ted, let me show you something on this map." Alice points and asks, "See this tiny island?" Ted answers, "Yes." Alice says, "That's where the people who care live."
Sunday September 25,
1994
Tags #personal uses, #office fax, #boss hassles dilberet, #fax paper, #phone lines, #electricity, #sent some over, #dilbert busts boss, #busts boss
Transcript
"It has come to my attention that you used the fax for personal business." "I sent the fax during lunch. It was a local call." "You're using up all of our fax paper." "No, I sent a fax. The paper doesn't travel through the phone lines." "It doesn't?" "You used the company's electricity." "I had a friend fax us a wad of extra electricity." "I'm using it right now to power my pc." "Did you get any extra electricity? My pc is out." "Press the button on the back and I'll fax you some."
Sunday November 20,
1994
Tags #share accomplishments, #created dcoument, #desktop publishing, #two day class, #digitized photos, #color highlights, #multi column, #clip art, #icons, #visual mosaic, #add topic, #some content, #enjoy work
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Let's go around the table and share our accomplishments." Dilbert says, "I created a document this week." Dilbert continues, "But THIS is no ordinary document!" Dilbert explains, "I bought a $500 desktop publishing program and took a two-day class to learn it." Dilbert continues, "I incorporated digitized photos and color highlights in a multi-column page layout!" Dilbert continues, "Clip-art icons are sprinkled liberally around the page to form a visual mosaic!" Dilbert continues, "Next week - God willing - I'll add a topic and some content." The Boss says, "Do you remember when I said you should enjoy your work? I didn't mean it." Dilbert says, "Ooh."
Thursday December 23,
1999
Tags #free medical advice, #some exercose, #lazy hog, #wait for ipo
Transcript
Dogbert is sitting at his computer and Dilbert stands behind him. Dogbert says: "I'm creating a web site of free medical advice." Dogbert's hears stand up as he screams: "Get some exercise, you lazy hog!!" Dilbert asks Dogbert: "Is that it?" Dogbert answers: "Nothing to do now but wait for the IPO."
Thursday February 24,
2000
Tags #technology demo, #software, #user interface, #not working, #gotta get some, #any questions, #engineering
Transcript
Caption reads: "The Technology Demo." Dilbert explains to the Boss and to Ted as they are reviewing the demo: "The software isn't 100% complete." Pointing at the monitor screen, Dilbert continues to explain: "If it had a user interface you would see something here...here...and sometimes here." He concludes: "And then you'd be saying, 'I gotta get me some of that.' Any questions?"
Wednesday August 30,
2000
Tags #tom peters advice, #become own brand, #get me some
Transcript
Wally says to Alice while pouring himself a cup of coffee, "I'm going to follow Tom Peters' advice and become my own brand." Alice replies, "The phrase you're least likely to hear is, 'I gotta get me some of that." Wally walks away thinking, "Day one: Not so good."
Friday July 20,
2001
Tags #the sociopth, #typing is optional, #eaten before, #some bread
Transcript
Headline: The Sociopath. Ron and Alice are sitting across from each other at restaurant table. Ted says, "Tipping is optional so I never do it." Alice looks surprised. She asks, "Um.. have you eaten here before?" A waitress approaches the table and angrily throws bread at Ron, hitting him on the head. She grunts, "Here's some bread." Alice looks on nervously.