Auto Service Comic Strips - Page 2

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148 Results for Auto Service

View 11 - 20 results for auto service comic strips. Discover the best "Auto Service" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #service, #include, #squeege, #glasses, #shirt, #full service

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Dilbert walks into "Jiffy Med Center" with a sore arm. The nurse says to Dilbert, "Do you want self service or the full service?" Dilbert answers, "Uh . . . full." Dilbert asks a man with a stethoscope, "What does full service include?" The man answers, "We squeegee your glasses and check under your shirt."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #self, #service, #curve, #pumps, #figure

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Dogbert stands in front of several men and says, "Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants will not be easy." Dogbert says, "Phillips! What would you do if a customer couldn't figure out how to use the pumps?" Phillips answers, "Nothing. It's self-service." The man sitting next to him thinks, "Great . . . there goes the curve."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #self, #service, #gas, #station, #attendant, #military, #benefits, #Women, #forms

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The caption says, "Day one: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." A student raises his hand and says, "Question." The man asks, "Do service station employees qualify for military benefits?" Dogbert replies, "I don't think so." The man asks, "Can we fool women with these uniforms?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #chool, #self-service, #gas, #station, #attendants, #thoughts, #minds, #easy

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The caption says, "Second day: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." Dogbert says, "You must learn to relax . . ." Dogbert continues, "I want you to clear your minds of all thoughts." The three students sit limply in their chairs with blank looks on their faces. Dogbert thinks, "That was too easy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #school, #self-service, #gas, #station, #attendants, #teaching, #section, #refolding, #maps, #frustrating, #paper cuts, #minor, #panic, #sweat the room

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Dilbert sits at his desk and says to Dogbert, "I heard you closed your school for self-service gas station attendants." Dogbert says, "It didn't work out." Dogbert continues, "I was teaching the section on refolding maps . . . Frustrations were high . . . At first, the paper cuts were minor, but panic swept the room." Dilbert asks, "Well, how bad could . . ." Dogbert says, "They're all dead . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #invented, #auto petter, #machine, #dumbest, #idea

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Dilbert holds a device and says to Dogbert, "I invented an auto-petter machine for you." Dilbert straps the machine to Dogbert's back. The auto-petter has a hand that rests on Dogbert's head. Dogbert says, "This is perhaps your dumbest idea ever." Dilbert starts the device and kneels on the floor in front of Dogbert. Dilbert says, "You like it. Admit it." Dogbert says, "Leave us alone."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #school, #common, #sense, #story, #clayton, #auto, #mechanic, #cigars, #gasoline, #engine, #lightning, #guess

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Dogbert stands in a dark classroom holding a pointer and using an overhead projector. Dogbert says, "This is the story of Clayton the Auto Mechanic." Dogbert continues, "Clayton smoked cigars while working on gasoline engines. What problem did this cause?" The projector shows an explosion. A man wrapped in bandages says, "He was hit by lightning every time?" Dogbert asks, "Does anybody beside Clayton have a guess?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #model, #evaluation, #advantage, #hideous, #service

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Dogbert says to a woman walking on the sidewalk, "Excuse me, would you like to take advantage of our 'Model Evaluation Service?' Only ten dollars." The woman says, "Me? Gosh, I've never thought of myself that way. Yes, I would love to be evaluated." Dogbert says, "You're hideous . . . That's ten dollars." The woman looks angry.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #mild, #flu, #normally, #survive, #brief, #developed, #empathy, #die, #afford, #ambassador, #class, #service

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Dogbert says to a patient on the examining table, "You have a mild flu, and normally you would survive." Dogbert continues, "However, in this brief visit I've developed no real empathy for you, so I've decided to let you die." The man asks, "Is there anything I can do?!" Dogbert replies, "Well . . . Unless you can afford my new 'Ambassador Class' service."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #dating, #service, #deep, #down, #fantasy, #woman, #modelled, #brochure, #francis, #kris

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Dogbert sits at a desk under a sign that says, "Dogbert's Dating Service." A man says, "I'd like to sign up." The customer continues, "Although deep down I know that all of the people in your service are men, I cling to the fantasy of meeting the woman who modeled for your brochure." Dogbert says, "She's taken, but I can match you with somebody named 'Francis' or 'Kris.'" The man replies, "There's hope!"