Bill Agtes Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

42 Results for Bill Agtes

View 11 - 20 results for bill agtes comic strips. Discover the best "Bill Agtes" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 30, 1999's comic on:

Tags #bill gates, #Dogbert, #incoming missles, #anti microsoft weapons, #press conference, #huge catapult

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits on the couch next to Dilmom. Dilbert says, on the phone, "Dogbert, Mom told Bill Gates she uses the "Linux" operating system!" Dogbert stand at a large control panel which included a radar screen. Dogbert says, "I'm tracking four incoming missles. I'll launch our anti-miscrosoft weapons to intercept." Three reporters fly through the air towards a missle that has "MS" on its side. One of thre reporters says, "I wondered why a press conference was being held in a huge catapult."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 2001's comic on:

Tags #give away prodcut, #for free, #deinstall it, #bill customers, #consumer despaitations

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "My plan is to give away our product for free." The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We'll only bill customers who ask us to deinstall it." Wally and Dilbert continue looking on impassively as The Boss continues, "For once, those reports of consumer decapitations will work in our favor."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 06, 2003's comic on:

Tags #new guy, #new hire, #bottleneck, #bill, #titanium

View Transcript

Transcript

Bottleneck Bill Bottlkeneck Bill: All purchase orders must be approved by me. I'll be too busy to approve anything but at least we have the system. Its titanium. Nice try. Alice: GRRRRR

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 2004's comic on:

Tags #cell phone bill, #expense, #award, #speech, #lost cell phone, #low bill, #company phone

View Transcript

Transcript

"The expense cutters award goes to Wally for drastically lowering his cell phone bill." "Wally, would you like to say a few words to the group?" "I lost my phone last month. Hey, thanks for the hundred dollars!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2004's comic on:

Tags #bottle neck bill, #philosophy, #worth doing, #worth delaying

View Transcript

Transcript

Bottleneck Bill perhaps you're wondering why I haven't answered your emails. Bill: My philopshy is that anything worth doing is worth delating. Dilbert: Plus you look like that. Bill: Like what?

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 2004's comic on:

Tags #bottle neck bill, #do his job, #miscellaneous

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "I need your help forcing Bottleneck Bill to do his job so I can do my job." "I'll be all over that... as soon as I finish other things." "What other things?" "Well, for example, miscellaneous."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 2005's comic on:

Tags #bill for consulting, #past year, #all in head, #recommendation, #status quo, #everything right

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Here's my bill for the consulting work I've done for you over the past year. The Boss: "What consulting? I haven't seen any reports." Dogbert: "I did it all in my head. I don't like to waste paper." The Boss: "What's your recommendation?" Dogbert: "Status Quo. You're doing everything right."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2014's comic on:

Tags #big business, #mergers & acquisitions, #worry, #short poition, #cartoon cat, #bloom county, #Comic Strip, #mantra, #bill ackman, #stocks, #defective people

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Bill Ackman just took a huge short position in our stock. Boss: I"m not worried about a cartoon cat from an old "Bloom County" comic strip. Dilbert: Maybe I care too much. Wally: That is the mantra of all defective people.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2011's comic on:

Tags #big business, #business ethics, #class, #more efficient, #government contract, #stuffed deer

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: This class will make me more efficient. Boss: I don't want you to be more efficient. You're working on a government contract and billing by the hour. Now go bill them for the time you stood here and stared at me like a stuffed deer.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2012's comic on:

Tags #business ethics, #agreements, #deals, #existence, #empire, #seem larger, #paycheck, #fair plan, #awful world, #balckmail, #boss, #employee

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: IF you agree to give me no work, I will agree to not sue you with some sort of bogus employee claim. My existence will make your empire seem larger, and stockholders will get stuck with the bill for my paycheck. Boss: Why does that seem like a fair plan? Wally: We live in an awful world.