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View 11 - 20 results for ceo stepped down comic strips. Discover the best "Ceo Stepped Down" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert The Third Ceo

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Dogbert The Third Ceo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business tactics, #ceos, #executives, #co ceo, #third ceo, #tiebreaker, #fired, #disagreement, #new guy

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CEO: I hired a co-CEO, but it isn't working because we disagree on everything. We want to hire you as our third CEO so we always have a tiebreaker. Dogbert: I accept. The new guy and I have decided to fire you and split the CEO spot two ways.

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Ceo Gets Rehired

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Ceo Gets Rehired - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dancing, #executives, #firing, #payback, #revenge, #vengeance, #rehired, #ceo, #security videos, #happy dance, #spasms

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CEO: Good news! I got rehired as CEO! I checked the security videos for the day I got fired, and not I'm getting revenge on anyone who did a happy dance. Dilbert: Did I...? CEO: Frankly, I can't tell. Do you have spasms?

Ceo Tosses Catbert

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Ceo Tosses Catbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executive, #ceo, #delegate, #respoinsibilities, #punishment

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CEO: You have been doing dumb things on social media. I am going to toss our evil director of Human Resources in your direction and run away. I love a lot of things about being CEO, but I think I love delegating the most. Boss: Gaaaa!!!

Ceo Compensation

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Ceo Compensation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #worth, #salary, #wages, #fairness, #fair, #pay, #expenses, #saving, #rich people, #executives

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Dilbert: I just saw your net worth on the Internet. What's this meeting about anyway? CEO: It's about keeping expenses down. Dilbert: More for you? CEO: That's not the spin I was going to put on it.

Ceo Wants A Crypto Wallet

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Ceo Wants A Crypto Wallet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo, #Wally, #crypto, #cryptocurrency, #game, #private key, #password, #done, #care

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CEO: How do I get a crypto wallet so I can get into the cryptocurrency game? Wally: I'll set one up for you and give you the private key and password when I'm done. CEO: I don't know how to thank you. Wally: That'll take care of itself.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #laziness, #seven layers of management, #lead company, #unknowingly, #bad idea, #input to avoid, #ceo, #middle management

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CEO: I plant to add seven more layers of management between you and me. My goal is to lead the company without knowing anything about it. Boss: That sounds like a bad idea. CEO: This sort of input is exactly what I'm trying to avoid.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #taxes, #warren buffet, #tax rate, #subsidizing mansion, #condescending, #show appreciation, #ceo, #high tax, #worker

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CEO: Warren Buffett says your tax rate is higher than mine. Thank you for subsidizing my mansion, I really appreciate it. A good leader always shows appreciation to his underlings.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #correlations, #predicted outcomes, #problem, #enormous ceo compensation, #myth, #control over profits, #awkward, #trap door, #ceo trick, #violent

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Dilbert: I did a study of our past business plans and found something. There's no correlation between our predicted and actual outcomes. That might be a problem for you. Your enormous CEO compensation is based on the myth that you have some control over our profitability. CEO: Ha! Dilbert: Ha! CEO: Is it just me or is this awkward? Dilbert: No, I'm feeling it too.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dissenters, #speak truth to power, #ignorant, #bald and overpaid, #respect, #ceo

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Dogbert: Do you respect those who speak truth to power? CEO: I don't know what that means. Dogbert: In this case it means you're ignorant, bald and overpaid. Do you respect me, or should I keep going?

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #pencil, #electric, #sharpener, #excalibert, #whoever, #remove, #ceo, #co-worker

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Dilbert says to a man, "Somebody left a pencil in the electric sharpener." The man replies, "That's 'Excalibert.'" The man continues, "Legend has it that whoever can remove Excalibert from the sharpener will become CEO." Dilbert removes the pencil and asks, "Like this?" A beam of light shines down on the pencil.