Chair Safety Training Comic Strips - Page 2

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584 Results for Chair Safety Training

View 11 - 20 results for chair safety training comic strips. Discover the best "Chair Safety Training" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Needs A New Chair

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Dilbert Needs A New Chair  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #chair, #complaining, #criticism, #irritation, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

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Dilbert: I need a more ergonomic office chair. Boss: Let me check the budget. Hmm...nope. We don't have a budget for making whiny employees happy. Dilbert: My current chair hurts my back. Boss: It's no picnic for the chair either.

Mandatory Training

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Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #avoidance, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #training

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Boss: You haven't finished the mandatory compliance training modules. Alice: I'm waiting for a strategic time to do them. Boss: Oh, okay. Want to go to lunch? Alice: I would love to, but I have training modules to do.

Old Time Chair

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Old Time Chair - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 16, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #chair, #office, #office workers, #ergonomics

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office worker: are you still using an old-time chair? office worker: i sit on a giant rubber ball because of all the ergonomics and stuff. office worker yelling: i'm better than you!!! dilbert: i wondered if there was a summary coming.

Falling Off An Ergonomic Chair

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Falling Off An Ergonomic Chair - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 17, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #ergonomic ball chair

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office worker: i fell off my ergonomic ball chair and broke my back. dilbert: i guess you'll be using a normal chair from now on. office worker yelling: i'm not a quitter! office worker on floor: maybe i'll give quitting a chance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #big business, #budget, #contract employees, #training budget, #training, #contractor budget

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Boss: Out budget for contact employees was eliminated. We'll have to pay you out of the training budget. So instead of doing the job yourself... you'll have to train Dilbert to do the job we're paying you to do. Dilbert: Why don't you just move some of the training budget to the contractor budget? Boss: If we reduce the training budget this year, we'll get less next year. Dilbert: So... you prefer paying two people to do the job of one? Boss: Right. Consultant: How do you stay in business? Boss: Our customers are even dumber than us.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 06, 2012's comic on:


Tags #booth, #brochure, #exhibitions, #exhibitor expenses, #expenses, #huge crowds, #last 11 years, #logo sign, #new customers, #popular booth, #spillover, #steal chair, #trade show, #video of incident, #youtube

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Boss: How did we do at the trade show? Dilbert: We had a huge crowd around our booth the entire time. But it was just the spillover from the popular booth next to us. The only person who asked for our brochure used it to kill a spider. Some guy tried to steal our extra chair and then Alice beat him senseless with our logo sign. A video of the incident is already on YouTube. It cost us $200,000 to be an exhibitor and we gained zero new customers. So it was just like the last eleven years. Boss: I feel good about next year!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 10, 2012's comic on:


Tags #better job, #goldilocks zone, #managers, #marinate in own stench, #monster, #skills expire, #technology certifictae, #training, #your training

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Dilbert: I need to get this technology certification. Boss: Whoa! No way. If I pay for your training, you'll use your certification to get a better job. At the moment, you're in what we managers call the goldilocks zone. You're not hot enough to get a better job, and you're not yet incompetent at the one you have. When your skills expire, in the next year or two, I'll replace you with someone younger. Dilbert: You're a monster! I'll pay for my own training and leave you to marinate in your own stench! CEO: How did you keep your training expenses so low? Boss: I marinated in my own stench.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 2012's comic on:


Tags #carbon dioxide, #exhales endangered species, #fabrications, #harbard, #higgs boson particle, #licorice and flashlight, #national football league, #no bragging rights, #no kids, #training for olympics

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Coworker: My daughter is training for the Olympics. My son is going to Harvard. Dilbert: I have no spawn of my own, so I claim the right to name a proxy to brag on my behalf. Topper, I need you. Topper: OF course you do. My daughter discovered the Higgs boson particle using nothing but licorice and a flashlight. My son inhales carbon dioxide and exhales endangered species while playing in the National Football League. Coworker: This isn't fair! You can't just make up stuff! Topper: According to the president of the International Society of Boasters, fabrications are acceptable. Coworker: I'd like to talk to that guy. Topper: You're looking at him. Dilbert: I win.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 19, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tombstone, #write, #cremated, #stuffed, #cheaper, #arm chair

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Dogbert sits in a chair and Dilbert stands in front of him. Dilbert asks, "If I died tomorrow, what would you write on my tombstone?" Dogbert replies, "I always assumed there would be no tombstone." Dilbert says, "Ah . . . You would have me cremated." Dogbert replies, "Or stuffed, whichever is cheaper."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 01, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #tv, #cable tv, #arm chair, #remote, #spit, #taste, #boring, #stupid, #theme

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Dilbert sits in his chair watching television. The voice on the tv says, "Tonight Siskel and Ebert review Dilbert's life." Ebert says, ". . . Boring and stupid . . . Look out, Gene; I'm gonna have to spit to get the taste out of my mouth . . ." Ebert continues, "Oops. Sorry, Gene." Dilbert points the remote control at the tv and changes the channel as he says, "I hate when they do these theme shows."