Degree In Engineering Comic Strips - Page 2
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307 Results for Degree In Engineering
View 11 - 20 results for degree in engineering comic strips. Discover the best "Degree In Engineering" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 24,
2011
Tags business ethics, retail business, sales trip, dont talk, misleading impression, engineering support, after sale, bag of meat, lying bag of meat
Transcript
Boss: I need you to come with me on a sales trip, but don't talk to the customer. Your presence is needed to give a misleading impression of how much engineering support we plan to offer after the sale. Dilbert: So I'm nothing but a bag of meat? Boss: No. You're a lying bag of meat.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday August 04,
1989
Tags Dilbert, coffee, third-degree
Transcript
Dilbert walks away from the coffee machine holding a cup of coffee. Dilbert says, "Now for the hard part: getting back to my desk without third-degree wrist burns." Dilbert screams. Dilbert stands outside his cubicle rubbing his wrist after spilling the coffee on the floor. Dilbert says, "I don't care for the taste, but it DOES keep me alert."
Thursday November 02,
1989
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, mysteries, china, great wall of china, armies, engineering, flop
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "And another of life's mysteries is, why do they call it the 'Great Wall of China?'" Dilbert continues, "It never really kept any invading armies out . . . Kind of a dismal flop from an engineering perspective." Dogbert says, "I don't think 'The Dismal Flop of China' would have the same tourist appeal." Dilbert replies, "I wouldn't pay to see it."
Wednesday March 28,
1990
Tags Dilbert, engineering, newsletter, interesting, pathos, human, drama, Dogbert, tissues
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dilbert thinks, "I've got to make the engineering newsletter more interesting." Dilbert thinks, "It needs pathos and human drama." Dilbert reads from a printout, "How to cope with the loss of loved data . . ." Dogbert says, "Wait . . . I better get some tissues."
Friday April 10,
1992
Tags Dilbert, company, person, brains, department, body, engineering, snot
Transcript
A man says to Dilbert, "Think of the company as a person. We in marketing would be the 'brains.'" The man continues, "The sales department would be the 'body.'" Dilbert asks, "What's engineering?" The man replies, "The snot."
Saturday April 11,
1992
Tags Dilbert, marketing, brent, engineering, micorwave, oven, computer, workstation, forever, croissant
Transcript
A woman says to Dilbert, "So, you're temporarily assigned to marketing and Brent went to engineering?" Dilbert replies, "Yeah . . ." In engineering, Brent points to a computer and asks, "What kind of microwave oven is this?" Wally replies, "That's a fifty MIP Sparc workstation, Brent." Brent places a croissant on the monitor and thinks, "In other words, it's going to take FOREVER to warm my croissant."
Saturday February 27,
1993
Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, pose, calendar, Men, engineering, dispel, myth, engineers, unaware, pumped, mouse, shirt
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert enters holding a camera and asks, "Would you like to pose for my new calendar, 'The Men of Engineering?'" Dogbert explains, "I hope to dispel the myth that engineers are out of shape and unaware of what others are thinking." Dilbert feels his bicep muscle and says, "I'm still kind of 'pumped' from using the mouse." Dogbert says, "Take off your shirt."
Monday March 22,
1993
Tags the boss, Dilbert, engineering, knowledge, promote, prima donna, demonstrate, personality, dissorders, mumble, disdain, humanity
Transcript
Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Your engineering knowledge is good, but I can't promote you to 'prima donna.'" The Boss continues, ". . . Unless you demonstrate a few more serious personality disorders." Dilbert replies, "I can mumble." The Boss says, "Sure, but can you do it with disdain for all of humanity?"
Wednesday April 21,
1993
Tags Dilbert, class, career, engineering, careers, cubicle, restroom, lower, electromagnetic fields, office, equipment, killing
Transcript
Dilbert says to a classroom of young students, "Engineering is one of the best careers available." Dilbert continues, "For the next twenty years I'll sit in a big box called a cubicle. It's like a restroom stall but with lower walls." Dilbert continues, "I spend most of my time hoping the electromagnetic fields from my office equipment aren't killing me." The children look horrified.
Tuesday May 25,
1993
Tags Wally, Dilbert, ted, productivity, daydreaming, irene, accounting, engineering, ordinary, betty, marketing
Transcript
Wally says to Dilbert and Ted, "My productivity is shot. I can't stop daydreaming about Irene in accounting." Ted says, "Do what I did. Try to phase out of it by daydreaming of Laura in engineering, then move to the ordinary-looking Betty in marketing." Wally replies, "Now I'm daydreaming about all three of them." Ted replies, "Same thing happened to me."