Destroy Comic Strips - Page 2
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39 Results for Destroy
View 11 - 20 results for destroy comic strips. Discover the best "Destroy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday December 19,
2010
Tags feel empowered, forgot buy in, poorly conceived project, destroy from inside, not empowered, old system
Transcript
The Boss says, "I want all of you to feel empowered on this project." Dilbert says, "You forgot to get our buy- in before you empowered us." The Boss says, "I'll get your buy-in later." Wally says, "It's far too late for that." Wally says, "I'm going to use my empowerment to destroy this poorly conceived project from the inside!" The Boss says, "Don't do that!" Dilbert says, "So... now you're saying we're not empowered to do what we think is best?" Alice says, "Can we go back to our old system where we're afraid to make decisions and you're never available?" Alice says, "Your eyes say, 'Yes.'"
Wednesday November 25,
2020
Protestors Destroy Our Stores
Tags protest movements, protestors, retail, stores, destroy, hate, cause, donate, context
Transcript
dilbert: all of our retail locations were destroyed by protesters last night. why do they hate us? dilbert: they don't hate us. we donate to their cause. dilbert: am i missing some context? boss: you should see what they do to the people they don't like.
Tuesday February 02,
2021
General Incompetence
Tags business, technology, project, success, expectations, destroy, incompetent, sarcasm
Transcript
dilbert: in summary, my project was successful beyond all expectations. Colleague: my relative lack of success this year makes me hate you and want to destroy you. dilbert: what's stopping you? colleague: general incompetence. same thing that killed all of my projects.
Friday March 02,
2012
Tags business ethics, environmental issues, fracking, competitors, headquarters, pollute water, generate earthquakes, fracking awesome
Transcript
CEO: We're going to start fracking under our biggest competitors headquarters. My plan is to pollute their water and generate earthquakes to destroy their campus. The project code name is "fracking awesome." Dilbert: Catchy.
Wednesday June 20,
1990
Tags Dogbert, poodle, nightfall, pound, incarceration, dream sequence, dangerous, place
Transcript
Dogbert: Don't worry, killer, I'll get us out of this pound by nightfall. Poodle: How? Dogbert: I used my one phone call to call a wrecking company to destroy this place. Poodle: That sound dangerous to me. Coming up: A near-death experience or possibly just a stupid dream sequence.
Friday April 30,
1993
Tags Dogbert, news, jobs, billion, owls, asteroid, coincidence, researchers, television, device, idiots
Transcript
The caption says, "Dogbert's good news show." Dogbert sits at a news desk and says, "Nine out of ten people have jobs . . . Three billion people had a nice day today . . . And the forest has plenty of owls." The caption says, "Regular news show." A news anchor says, "A huge asteroid could destroy earth! And by coincidence, that's the subject of tonight's miniseries." The other reporter yells, "We'll all die!!" The caption says, "Back to Dogbert . . ." Dogbert holds a remote control and says, "In science, researchers proved that this simple device can keep idiots off of your television screen."
Sunday October 22,
1989
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, door, wrecking, house, johnsons, leveled, noise
Transcript
Dogbert and Dilbert sit at a table. The doorbell rings and Dilbert says, "Dogbert, see who's at the door." A man tells Dogbert, "Hi. I'm from the 'Big Ball Wrecking Company.' I have a work order to destroy this house." Dogbert reads the order and syas, "Looks like you have the wrong address. This is Walnut AVENUE. Walnut STREET is clear across town." The man says, "Oh phlegm! I don't have time to drive way over there." The man asks, "Would it be a bother if I just leveled this house instead?" Dogbert replies, "That would be a tad inconvenient. Try the Johnsons, next door." Dilbert asks, "What was that loud noise?" Dogbert replies, "Apparently the Johnsons aren't home."
Friday October 11,
1996
Tags strategic alliance, doomed, inefficient managemnet, create competing compnay, must find, new company, strategic allainace
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of an overhead projector and points at a skull and crossbones diagram. Dilbert says, "The status of our strategic alliance is 'doomed.'" Dilbert continues while the Boss listens, "Our ponderous and inefficient management style caused their best people to quit and create a competing company." The Boss says, "We must find a way to destroy that new company." Dilbert replies, "I'll see if they're interested in a strategic alliance."
Sunday December 15,
1996
Tags upgarde, product design, overheat, big picture, no benefits, over heating, sales are strong, end civilization
Transcript
The Boss tells Dilbert, "I made an upgrade to your product design." He hands Dilbert a document. Dilbert says, "This would make the product overheat." The Boss says, "Let's try to look at the big picture." Dilbert reads the document and says, "Okay . . . Let's see . . . Your upgrade has no benefits and it costs more." Dilbert continues, "The overheating would start office fires and put all of our customers out of business." Dilbert continues, "If our sales are strong, we could create economic chaos and a global firestorm." Dilbert concludes, "Your 'upgrade' would destroy civilization as we know it." The Boss says, "Keep me informed." Back at home, Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dogbert asks, "So you're going to end civilization as we know it?" Dilbert replies, "I don't think I'll miss it, frankly."
Friday January 05,
2001
Tags created software, copyrighted work, available, for free, plunge, depression, creativity, psychology
Transcript
Asok the Intern says to Dilbert, "I created software that makes all copyrighted work on the net available for free!" Dilbert asks Asok, "Wouldn't that destroy all forms of creativity and plunge us into a depression?" Asok says to Dilbert, "Yes... But it is very neat."
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