Ears Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

83 Results for Ears

View 11 - 20 results for ears comic strips. Discover the best "Ears" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 17, 2004's comic on:


Tags #assistant for five years, #questions boss, #leadership, #frustrated, #bugging, #wax ears

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Something's been bugging me. Carol: Ive been an executive assistant for five years. when do I get promoted to executive? Ive got leadership coming out of my ears! The boss: Thats wax.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2005's comic on:


Tags #calculate expected value, #pretend to be dead, #cover ears

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The best way to make this decision is by calculating the expected value of each possible outcome. you multiply the... The Boss: Must pretend to be dead. Dilbert: I sense that were done here. The Boss: I hope the dead sometimes cover their ears.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 2007's comic on:


Tags #analyzed dna, #most qualified applicant, #willing to work, #has three ears, #snout, #life expectancy of thursday, #new guy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I analyzed the DNA of all of your applicants to find the best fit for the job. The most qualified applicant who is willing to work for you has three ears, a snout, and a life expectancy of Thursday." The Boss: Dilbert, meet the new guy. And do it quickly." cough cough

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2009's comic on:


Tags #rejecting, #objecting, #ridicule, #ears, #pointed, #offended

View Transcript

Transcript

Mordac, the preventer of information service Mordac says ,"Cloud computing is no good because strangers would have access to our data." Dilbert says, "I trust encryption way more than I trust spock-eared sociopaths." Dilbert says, "When you mention a person's ears, he won't listen to the rest of your argument."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 2004's comic on:


Tags #extreme makeover, #buisness, #Dogbert, #rework a face, #plastic surgery, #scary, #human makeover, #ears, #antlers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: "I'm going into the extreme makeover business." "I'm planning to take it to the next level." "You'd look good with antlers." "And the nose has to go." Man: "Go?" "Your tiny ears are out of proportion." "These are ears." "I'll also rearrange your fat so you can't see it." "I'll toss in a few extras after you're unconscious, no charge." "Guess how old I am."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #headphones, #borrow, #ears, #reluctant, #smell forever

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: May I borrow your headphones while you're at lunch? Dilbert: would they touch your ears? WALLY: Yes. Dilbert:I reject your request. I don't want cooties on my headphones. Dilbert: Plus, you never return anything you borrow. Wally: Why would you care if my ears touch something you will neve see again? Lets meet halfway. I'll return the headphones, but they will smell of me forever. Dilbert: Then you might as well just keep them! It doesnt feel like he met me halfway.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 06, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #good, #news, #corners, #doctors, #vet, #better, #scared, #boo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on his pillow humming. Dilbert sneaks up behind Dogbert and says, "Boo!" Dogbert's ears fly up and he says, "Eeek!" Dogbert sits on an examining table with his ears still standing straight up. The doctor says, "The good news is you'll handle better on corners . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #secretary, #cerberus, #calendar, #head, #willy, #mail, #boy, #choice, #bowling

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, ". . . So, then my boss's secretary, Miss Cerberus, says she won't put me on the calendar unless I bring her the HEAD of Willy the Mail Boy." Dilbert holds out a bag with something round in it and says, "What choice did I have?" Dogbert's ears fly up in shock. Dilbert says, "I went bowling." Dogbert looks angry.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1991's comic on:


Tags #exercise, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #joined, #bowling, #league, #yikes, #lower middle class, #muscle, #little arm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert arrives at home carrying a bowling ball in a case. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I joined a bowling league." Dogbert's ears fly up in surprise and he says, "Yikes! We've become lower middle-class!" Dilbert says, "Don't be ridiculous. Bowling is good exercise. I'm doing it to build muscle tone." At the bowling alley, Dilbert sees three men who have one huge arm and one little arm. One of the men says, "Hey! 'Little Arm.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 20, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #trader, #stocks, #illegal, #trading, #information, #board, #meeting, #san francisco

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've decided to become an inside trader of stocks." Dilbert replies, "Inside trading is illegal. Besides, where will you get your information?" Dogbert raises his ears and says, "Shhh . . . I hear a board meeting starting San Francisco."