Fighting Porcupines Comic Strips - Page 2

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23 Results for Fighting Porcupines

View 11 - 20 results for fighting porcupines comic strips. Discover the best "Fighting Porcupines" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 2012's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #criticize, #enjoy anticipation, #fighting, #incented, #staff meeting

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Boss: I'm waiting for people to walk by so I can criticize you in front of others. Dilbert: What? Boss: I want the criticism to sting as much as possible so you'll be incented to do all the right things in the future. I guess it can wait until the staff meeting. Dilbert: That way I can enjoy the anticipation, too.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 1989's comic on:


Tags #compliment, #home, #design

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Dogbert sits at a desk and says, "The designs for my revolutionary new 'home defense system' are now complete." Dilbert looks at the plans and says, "Well, this is very detailed. But where do you think we can find this many 'flying attack porcupines?'" Dogbert says, "Just TRY to get a compliment out of that man."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 1995's comic on:


Tags #shipped new prodcut, #tech support, #trained, #embarrasments, #monk, #training, #material, #real monk, #pig latin

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The Boss speaks to three employees in tech support. He says, "We just shipped our newest product. You folks in tech support will need to be trained so you can avoid any embarrassments." The Boss says, "We had a monk write the training material on a grain of rice. We could only afford one, so you'll have to share it." The Boss tosses a grain of rice at them and they lunge for it. As the employees fall to the floor fighting, the Boss says, "To be honest, I'm not sure we had a real monk. He wrote everything in Pig Latin."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 2006's comic on:


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"If you hire me as your lobbyist I will convince Switzerland to attack Elbonia." $ "When the war begins, your sales of Kevlar Lederhosen will skyrocket!" "It's not as bad as it sounds. Elbonians believe that if they die fighting a neutral country, their souls get candy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 2008's comic on:


Tags #predictable, #sneezed, #fighting predictability, #predicts sneeze

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The Boss: Dilbert says I'm predictable. Am I predictable? Catbert: Gesundheit in advance. The Boss: Must...Control sneeze. Must...Not be...predictable." "Mroomph!" Catbert: Yesterday I drew a picture of what this would look like."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 04, 2009's comic on:


Tags #temp, #angry, #bragging, #fighting, #violence, #injury, #pain

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Overqualified temp Asok the intern says, "It's funny that you're a Rhodes scholar yet you can only find work as a temp." Asok the intern says, "I am only an intern and yet I enjoy the power and prestige of being your supervisor." Asok the intern says, "In retrospect I shouldn't have challenged her to a cage fight."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 19, 2008's comic on:


Tags #idea squirrel, #steals your ideas, #treats you like a nut, #tackle him, #boss office, #squirrel, #great ideas

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Asok says, "Anyway, that's what I think should be done." Dilbert says, "IDEA SQUIRREL!" Asok says, "WHAT? WHAT?" Dilbert says, "The idea squirrel steals your ideas and treats you like a nut for saying they were yours!" Asok says, "What do I do now?" Dilbert says, "Your only hope is to tackle him before he gets to our boss's office." Asok says, "GAAA!!!" The Idea Squirrel says, "Grrr..." Someone says, "Ow! Ow! Ow!" The Boss says, "Why is the squirrel that always has great ideas fighting with that nut?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 01, 2015's comic on:


Tags #fitness, #martial arts, #violence, #fighting, #yoga, #misunderstanding, #exercise, #fusion, #danger, #health

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Dilbert: I'm almost positive yoga is not one of the martial arts. Boss: Not by itself. We're learning a defensive style of yoga that incorporates the more violent elements of feng shui and Irish dancing. Dilbert: That doesn't sound lethal. Boss: Put your head on the ground and say that again.

Rather Eat Garbage

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Rather Eat Garbage - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 2017's comic on:


Tags #choosing, #choices, #boredom, #listening, #trash, #garbage, #suffering

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Wally: Would you rather eat garbage or listen to our boss talk about his weekend? Dilbert: I'd have to know more about the garbage to make that decision. Wally: Let's say it's mostly kitchen stuff. Dilbert: Am I eating it from the can or fighting birds for it?

Asok Is Offended By Wally

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Asok Is Offended By Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 02, 2017's comic on:


Tags #offense, #insult, #offensive, #fighting, #nonviolent resistance

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Asok: I hear you have been comparing yourself to Gandhi, the father of my birth country. That is offensive. It makes me want to punch you. Wally: Have you tried fasting instead? I hear good things about it.