Forty Hours Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

226 Results for Forty Hours

View 11 - 20 results for forty hours comic strips. Discover the best "Forty Hours" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #pillow, #servants, #dog, #hours, #Dilbert, #prison

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a pillow thinking, "When I conquer the earth . . . Will it be more efficient to put all humans in prison . . ." Dogbert continues thinking, ". . . Or train them as domestic servants for dogs?" Dilbert watches Dogbert from the doorway and thinks, "It's amazing how dogs can sit for hours thinking absolutely nothing."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 30, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #elves, #elf, #magic, #elf magic, #conquer, #world, #pick, #Card, #serious, #clubs, #forty three of clubs

View Transcript

Transcript

An elf says to three other elves, "I say we elves have been pushed around too long!" The elf says, "Let's use our elf magic to conquer the world!!" Another elf replies, "Yeah! Elf magic!" An elf holds a deck of playing cards and says to Dogbert, "C'mon, pick a card - any card!! And this time be serious!!" Dogbert says, "I'll take the forty-three of clubs."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #bad schdeuling, #careless, #company cares, #last tuesday, #long hours, #missed out, #stress on workers, #stress redcution expert, #stressful, #talk at lunch, #too late

View Transcript

Transcript

"The company cares deeply about the effects of long hours and stress on workers." "So they're paying nearly $200 to have an expert on stress-reduction give a talk during lunch." "Just when you think they don't care, something like this comes along." "It's scheduled for lst Tuesday."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 1995's comic on:


Tags #perfromance appraisel, #four years, #starting documentation, #fire me later, #24 hours aday, #motivational

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss stands behind Alice's desk and says, "Alice, I'm almost done with your performance appraisal." Alice looks horrified and gasps. Alice turns her chair to face the Boss and says, "I haven't had an appraisal in four years. You must be starting a documentation trail so you can fire me later." Alice types wildly and yells, "I'LL WORK 24 HOURS A DAY!!" The Boss thinks, "That was way more motivational than I'd hoped."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 1995's comic on:


Tags #create illusion, #work long hours, #voice mails, #Dilbert, #in underwear, #obscene message, #group code

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert hands Dilbert the phone and says, "You can create the illusion that you work long hours by leaving voice mails for your boss at 4 a.m." Dilbert says into the phone, "Hi, this is Dilbert. It's 4 a.m. and I'm in my underwear and I thought of you . . .Oops . . . Erase . . . Oops . . ." As he presses the buttons on the phone it makes beeping noises. Dogbert's ears stand up in astonishment. Dogbert asks, "Did you just send an obscene message to your boss?" Dilbert looks at the phone and says, "No . . . I think I hit the group code."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 1995's comic on:


Tags #payroll computer, #gie raise, #Dogbert, #not ethical, #five percent raise, #quality of work

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands at Dilbert's desk working on the computer and Dilbert sits next to him. Dilbert says, "It isn't ethical to hack into the payroll computer and give me a raise, Dogbert." Dogbert replies, "Not ethical?? Is it ethical for them to make you work seventy hours a week and only pay you for forty??!!" Dilbert asks, "How about a five percent raise?" Dogbert replies, "Well, there is the issue of the quality of your work . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #wage, #benefits, #package, #disloyalty, #verbal, #abuse, #occasional, #legal, #problems, #twenty-four, #hours, #recognition, #positively, #giddy, #toaster

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at a desk. Dilbert says, "Yes?" Dogbert says, "I'm demanding a new wage and benefits package." Dilbert says, "I already give you everything you want . . ." Dilbert continues, "And in return you give me disloyalty, verbal abuse and occasional legal problems." Dogbert says, "Okay, it's a good job, but I'm putting in twenty-four hours a day!" Dogbert continues, "I think I deserve some sort of special recognition for my good work." An "Employee of the Month" poster with Dogbert's picture hangs on the refrigerator. Dogbert says, "I'm positively giddy." Dilbert says, "You edged out the toaster by two votes."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 1996's comic on:


Tags #had a cat once, #two hours, #beef of cat, #selfish

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit at the lunch table. Wally says, "I had a cat once . . ." Wally continues, "I petted that thing for two hours but I didn't feel any better." Dilbert says, "Petting is for the benefit of the cat, not your hand." Wally says, "They're so selfish."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 1996's comic on:


Tags #idiot fell, #twelve hours, #chair safety training, #do, #not do

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Alice, "Some idiot stood on a chair and fell off." The Boss continues, "Now we all have to take twelve hours of chair safety training." Wally and Alice wince. During training Alice, Wally and the Boss watch a man standing on his head and spinning on a chair. The Boss whispers, "Is that a 'do' or a 'not do?'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 11, 1996's comic on:


Tags #quality initiative, #decour, #productive hours, #lower morale, #profitability, #contest, #qualicide

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, Alice and Wally, "I'm assigning each of you to a separate 'quality' initiative." Wally asks, "Is there any risk this will devour our productive hours, lower our morale and have no impact on our profitability?" The Boss says, "And we'll have a contest to come up with a name for the overall initiative." Wally asks, "How about 'Qualicide?'"