Hire A Big Name Comic Strips - Page 2

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747 Results for Hire A Big Name

View 11 - 20 results for hire a big name comic strips. Discover the best "Hire A Big Name" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 09, 2011's comic on:


Tags #anger, #envy, #big promotion, #congratulations, #not jealous, #good work, #art of full body lying

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Ted: Hey, Alice! Did you hear about my big promotion? Alice: Congratulations, Ted. I'm not jealous at all. Keep up the good work. Sorry about my face. I haven't mastered the art of full-body lying.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 2012's comic on:


Tags #app store, #created app, #dream killer, #first name, #free apps, #madonna, #sell a million, #mother, #Family

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Dilbert: I spent four months creating this app, mom. I think I can sell a million of them for $3.99. Mom: I saw seven apps just like this in the app store and five of them were free. Dilbert: Thanks for the feedback, dream-killer. Mom: Have you ever thought of just using your first name, like Madonna?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 22, 2012's comic on:


Tags #being a jerk, #big picture, #breaking up tasks, #emotionally gutted, #engineer, #engineers, #individual tasks, #losing will to live, #meetings, #personal life, #project plan, #rational plan, #sense of purpose, #engineering

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Boss: Any comments on the project plan? Dilbert: When you consider all of the tasks together, they form a rational plan. But our individual tasks are so far removed from the big picture that they are stripped of meaning. You've managed to remove all sense of purpose from my life. On an intellectual level, I understand the benefits of breaking tasks into small chunks. But you've left me emotionally gutted. As I read your plan, I'm losing my will to live. Boss: Can't you find meaning in your personal life? Tina: He's an engineer. Dilbert: Now you're just being a jerk.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 2012's comic on:


Tags #business failures/bankruptcies, #too big to fail, #two pigs, #flail, #clever, #demoralizing

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Boss: Are we too big to fail? CEO: Nope. We're more like two pigs that flail. Boss: That's clever, and yet demoralizing. CEO: You're welcome.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 04, 2012's comic on:


Tags #monkeys, #big picture, #motivated, #monkey, #assignment, #eating banana, #imitating monkey, #animals

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Dilbert: I would feel more motivated if I knew how my assignment fits into the big picture. Boss: You don't need to be motivated. A monkey could do your assignment while eating a banana. Like this. Ooh-ooh-ooh! Dilbert: I think we're moving in the wrong direction.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 1989's comic on:


Tags #name, #names, #ruler

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Dilbert says to Phil, "Gee, if you're the ruler of 'Heck' you must have some kind of awesome name." Phil replies, "Yeah." Dilbert asks, "Well, what is it? Something like 'King of Evil' or 'Lord of Darkness?'" Phil replies, "You can call me Phil, Prince of Insufficient Light."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 07, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #shower, #egg, #lassie, #rin tin tin, #benji, #big, #furry

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Dogbert stands on a stool and looks in the bathroom mirror. He asks, "Do you think I look more like Rin Tin Tin or Lassie? Maybe Benji?" Dilbert stands in front of the shower with a towel around his waist. Dilbert replies, "I dunno . . . Maybe a big furry egg." Dogbert says, "With that little inspiration boost, I believe I am ready to attack the new day."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #dog, #pound, #one, #phone, #call, #big, #ball, #demolition, #company

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Dogbert stands in a cage thinking, "No stupid dog pound can hold me for long." Dogbert yells to the dog catcher, "Hey, screw! Don't I get one phone call?!" Dogbert whispers into the telephone, "Hello, is this the Big Ball Demolition Company? . . . Good, I have a rush job for you . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #rat, #mickey, #rodney, #rodent, #bill, #vernon, #vermin, #ratbert, #arm chair, #table

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Dogbert says to a rat, "If you're going to live here, you need a name." The rat asks, "How about 'Mickey?'" Dogbert replies, "No . . . Big trouble. How about 'Rodney the Rodent?'" The rat asks, "How about 'Bill the Rat?'" Dogbert asks, "Vernon the Vermin?" The rat says, "Ratbert."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 15, 1990's comic on:


Tags #judicial proceedings, #Dilbert, #jury, #duty, #name, #betrayed, #Dogbert, #mcmahon, #ed, #law

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Dilbert stands in front of the mailbox reading a letter. Dilbert says, "Oh, carp!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I've been called for jury duty." Dogbert says, "Me, too." Dilbert says, "Dogs can't do jury duty. How did they get your name?" Dogbert replies, "I've been betrayed by Ed McMahon."