Investing Comic Strips - Page 2

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16 Results for Investing

View 11 - 16 results for investing comic strips. Discover the best "Investing" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags investing, rudeness, firing, downsizing

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Dogbert says, "Your stock fell a penny a share so I bough 51% of the company." Dogbert says, "I'll double my investment just by firing you." Dogbert says, "Thanks for not being totally worthless." Man says, "You're welcome."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sitting, lunch, investing, money, crime, trick

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Wally says, "I retired from my life of corporate crime and put all of my illicit earnings in a mutual fund." Dilbert says, "How do you know the mutual fund is legitimate?" Wally says, "What?" The boss says, "We got all of the money back?" Dogbert says, "We?"

Financial Advisor Is Surprised At How Easy It Is

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Financial Advisor Is Surprised At How Easy It Is - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags financial advisor, investing, money, stock market, swindling, convertible notes, preferred stock, call options, career ambition, ginat mosquito

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Financial Advisor. Advisor: Convertible notes... preferred stock... municipal bonds... covered call options. These are things you can never hope to understand. So trust me and try to forget that my only career ambition is to drain your account like a giant mosquito. Boss: That sounds reasonable. Advisor: I'm always surprised at how easy this is.

Everyone Can Beat The Market Average

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Everyone Can Beat The Market Average - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, investor, stock market, stock reserch, money

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Boss: Asok, you can beat market averages by doing your own stock research. Asok: So... you believe every investor can beat the average by reading the same information? Boss: Yes. Asok: Makes you wonder why more people don't do it. Boss: Just lazy, I guess.

Asok The Stock Picking Genius

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Asok The Stock Picking Genius - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags day trader, greed, investing, luck, money, stock market, stocks

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Asok: I bought my first stock and it went up five percent in one week!That means I'm a stock-picking genius. I plan to max out all of my credit cards and become a day-trader. Dilbert: The total market is up six percent. Asok: That's just luck. It can't do that forever.