Libido Killer Comic Strips - Page 2
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21 Results for Libido Killer
View 11 - 20 results for libido killer comic strips. Discover the best "Libido Killer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday February 27,
2019
Loss Of Libido
Tags #dating, #doctors, #marriage, #medicines, #relations between the sexes, #sex
Transcript
Man: My new meds totally eliminated my libido. But my doctor says I need them. Dilbert: Does your wife mind? Man: Not since she started dating my doctor.
Sunday April 21,
2019
Never Ask About The Sigh
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships, #serial killer
Transcript
carol, asok and dilbert at a conference table. carol: sigh carol: sigh asok: what's wrong? dilbert distressed: gaaaa!!! never ask about the sigh! dilbert: it's a trap to make you listen to a distressing story full of woe. carol: my husband is a hunter and he wants me to learn how to skin and cook his kills. asok: that doesn't sound so bad. dilbert: wait for it. carol: he's a serial killer. dilbert: and there it is.
Wednesday June 20,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #poodle, #nightfall, #pound, #incarceration, #dream sequence, #dangerous, #place
Transcript
Dogbert: Don't worry, killer, I'll get us out of this pound by nightfall. Poodle: How? Dogbert: I used my one phone call to call a wrecking company to destroy this place. Poodle: That sound dangerous to me. Coming up: A near-death experience or possibly just a stupid dream sequence.
Friday November 20,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #elbonia, #fox, #killed, #rebel, #leader, #code, #name, #piglet, #hamster
Transcript
Dogbert sits on the hassock watching tv. A newscaster says, "In Elbonia, the rebel leader known as 'The Fox' was killed." The newscaster continues, "By Elbonian law, his killer becomes the new rebel leader. We do not know his code name yet." In Elbonia, three Elbonians confront Dilbert. One of them says, "We've narrowed it down to either 'The Piglet' or 'The Hamster.'"
Friday June 23,
2006
Thursday February 19,
2009
Tags #meeting, #ridiculous, #explanation, #business
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Sorry I'm late. My company cut the travel budget so I had to hitch a ride with a serial killer." Dilbert says, "He took me to an abandoned slaughterhouse. I knocked him out with a hambone, stole his truck and drove directly here." Man says, "All I heard was 'Blah, blah, blah, I'm late.'" Dilbert says, "Don't make me get my hambone."
Sunday January 07,
2001
Tags #battery technology, #question motives, #transformation, #lying, #avoid work, #manual labor
Transcript
Dilbert says to a female co-worker, "No known battery technology can handle this load and be this size." The female co-worker folds her arms as Dilbert says, "That's not what you wanted to hear." The female co-worker grimaces as Dilbert says, "So your mind will erase what I said..." Dilbert continues, "... And replace the memory with something totally ridiculous so you can question my motives." The female co-worker grunts, "Gaah!" Dilbert thinks, "The transformation is complete." The female co-worker exclaims, "How can you say there's no such thing as a battery?!" The female co-worker berates Dilbert, "You're lying to avoid work! I'm going to talk to your boss!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Lately, the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labor." Dogbert says, "You're preaching to the choir."
Saturday July 25,
2015
Wally Follows His Passion
Tags #passion, #motivation, #Advice, #misunderstand, #misunderstanding, #attraction, #follow, #following
Transcript
Wally: I'm running low on motivation. What can you do for me? Boss: Follow your passion. Woman: Stop following me. Wally: Dream-killer.
Monday March 28,
2016
Wally Has Passon For No Goals
Tags #goals, #achievement, #laziness, #work ethic, #catch-22, #guest artist, #donna oatney
Transcript
Wally: You told us we need to set goals and have passion. But what if my passion is to avoid having measurable goals? Boss: You're passionate about being useless? Wally: Hey, back off, dream-killer.
Sunday December 01,
2019
Dilbert Murders Robots
Tags #office workers, #business, #robot, #technology, #human resources, #bad behavior, #reboot, #murder, #plot, #erase
Transcript
dilbert: last week i upgraded our robot's social awareness module. it immediately reported me to human resources for unspecified bad behavior. so i murdered the robot by erasing its memory and rebooting it. but another robot told it what happened, and then both of them plotted to kill me. so i erased the memory from both robots and then rebooted them. but a third robot found out about the first two, and now the entire robot community sees me as a serial killer. so i released a computer virus to kill every robot in the world, just to play it safe. wally: what happened to the lights? dilbert: uh-oh. i missed one.
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