Search Results for "location"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 06, 2004's comic on:


Tags #elbonia, #call center, #moved call centers, #anyone will notice, #disguised location

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The Boss: "We've moved our call centers to Elbonia but we don't think anyone will notice." Elbonia: "Hello, how may I help you? My name is Kruphnehdahpheweundikaniswalyniaphorganopop." "I mean...Carl."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2006's comic on:


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"Do you know where Asok is?" "NO, I DO NOT!" "Do you think it's my job to know the location of all employees? Do you? Do you? Do you?" "Have you seen Alice?" "GAAA!!! MY HAIR IS ON FIRE!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2005's comic on:


Tags #weekly wally report, #worthless iput, #harmful advice, #ignored email, #priorities, #my budget estimates, #any success, #format

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"The Weekly Wally Report is bristling with tales of success." "I gave worthless input to marketing because they weren't specific about what they wanted." "I missed Alice's project meeting because she never confirmed the location." "I gave harmful advice to the sales team because they rushed me." "I ignored my email for a week because you said to focus on priorities." "And I didn't submit my budget estimates because Asok never told me what format to ues." "How can you call any of that success??!!" "Well, I'd compare it to my written objectives, but you never gave me any."

Dogbert Advises Dilbert On Escaping

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Dogbert Advises Dilbert On Escaping - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2015's comic on:


Tags #identity, #hacker, #hacking, #government, #manhunt, #technology, #money, #ruse, #trick, #greed, #betrayal

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Dilbert: The government threatened to kill me if I don't sell them my anti-hacker app. Dogbert: You should change your identity, give me everything you own, and move to an undisclosed location. Dilbert: Will we have a secret way to stay in contact? Dogbert: You're becoming a burden.

P Ity The Windowless

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P Ity The Windowless - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2016's comic on:


Tags #cubicle, #office, #office workers, #location, #window, #ego, #superiority

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Tina: Do you think you're better than me just because you have a cubicle with a window? Wally: Yes. Continuous exposure to new stimuli makes my brain create useful pathways and connections. Tina: I did not see that coming. Wally: I pity the windowless.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 2017's comic on:


Tags #time machine, #time travel, #experiment, #algorithm, #planning, #mistake, #error, #science

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Boss; Ted, we need a volunteer to test the time machine prototype. Ted: Is it safe? Boss: Of course it is. Would I ask you to risk your life if it were not safe? Ted: Yes. Boss: Oh, I didn't realize you knew that. But don't worry. The engineering consensus is that it will work. Dilbert: You will return to this exact spot in one day. Alice: Does our location algorithm account for planetary movement? Ted: I should have asked more questions.

Finding Alice

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Finding Alice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 2018's comic on:


Tags #surveillance, #data, #spying, #location, #privacy

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Boss: Does anyone know where Alice is? Dilbert: Yes. The CIA, Google, Facebook, Apple, and Russian hackers know where she is. Boss: But we have no way to find her? Dilbert: Depends. Was she dumb enough to download our company app?