Made Sandwhiches Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

333 Results for Made Sandwhiches

View 11 - 20 results for made sandwhiches comic strips. Discover the best "Made Sandwhiches" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #take six months, #time line, #leadership, #made me unmotivated, #foreseen or unforseen, #wally is dysfunctional, #schedule is random, #looks mad

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss points to a board that says, "Time Line." He says, "The project will take six months..." He continues, "Unless there are unforeseen problems." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question." Dilbert says to the Boss, "Your leadership has made me unmotivated." Dilbert asks, "Is that considered foreseen or unforeseen?" Dilbert continues, pointing at Wally, "And Wally is dysfunctional on many levels." Wally agrees, "I really am." Dilbert asks, "Was that foreseen? Or are you saying the schedule is random?" Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "He looks mad." Alice says, "I didn't see that coming."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #being ceo, #made smarter, #capital of japan, #mitubishi, #genius

View Transcript

Transcript

The best part about being CEO is that it made me smarter. Watch this. "The capital of Japan is Mitsubishi." "That's right! You're a genius!" "Yesterday I would have said nine."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #prosperity, #intuition, #market research, #success rate, #binary choices, #tiny manager, #made of copper, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: From now on, I'm going to rely on my intuition instead of market research. Dilbert: If guessing can bring your success rate up to 50% for binary choices, I'm all for it. Hey, look! I found a tiny manager made of copper in my pocket!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company invested, #billion dollars, #made up numbers, #slide to oblivion, #made a difference, #victims

View Transcript

Transcript

"The company decided to invest a billion dollars based on your stupid made-up numbers." "You've crushed my dreams of a better tomorrow. Now my life is a cold, wet slide to oblivion." "I finally made a difference at work." "how many victims?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget cut, #health, #bleak, #public, #poorly made prodcuts, #elevant, #organs, #still healthy, #black market

View Transcript

Transcript

After Budget cuts The boss: It might seem bleak now, but things will turn around... As soon as the public starts loving poorly made products that are relevant to a bygone era. In the meantime, who has organs that are still healthy enough to sell on the black market?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #comic ends early, #embedded punchline, #follow passion, #joking, #made fat, #set up, #blank frame, #sight gag

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I tried to follow my passion but it only made me fat. Dogbert: This comic ends early because some idiot embedded the punch line in the setup. Message to Readers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complimenting people, #flattery, #indirect, #made car, #make his own car, #new car, #parking lot

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I saw you new car in the parking lot. It's nice. Topper: Thank you. Dilbert: I'm complimenting the people who made your car, not you. Topper: Well, I guess only one of us knows how to make his own car.

Dogbert Designed The Simulation

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Designed The Simulation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #simulation, #creator, #three dimensional, #avatar, #truth, #made

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i didn't want to tell you this, but you're a simulation designed by a three-dimensional creator. and i'm an avatar used by your creator to interact with your world. dilbert: i refuse to believe that is true dogbert: yep. that's how i made you

Elbonian Virus

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Virus - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #health & safety, #office workers, #pandemic, #elbonian, #virus, #kill, #beards, #fuzzy, #hat, #made

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: the elbonian virus has reached pandemic proportions. elbonian: just because a virus doesn't kill people with beards and tall, fuzzy hats, that doesn't mean it was made in elbonia. dilbert: was it made in elbonia? elbonian: yes, but i think my point still stands.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computers & peripherals, #embarrassment, #internet & world wide web, #developed app, #spare time, #awful thing, #lees hinest, #marketing, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: I developed this app in my spare time. What do you think? Dilbert: I think you made spare time look like an awful thing. If you'd like a less honest answer, I can recommend someone in marketing. Ted: I might try that.