Meetings Turn Awkward Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

459 Results for Meetings Turn Awkward

View 11 - 20 results for meetings turn awkward comic strips. Discover the best "Meetings Turn Awkward" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 27, 2011's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #collegue, #associate, #teammate, #subordinate, #awkward

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: And this is Carol. She's my... Carol: Colleague? Boss: No. Carol: Associate? Boss: No. Carol: Teammate? Boss: No. I was going to say "subordinate," but now it's awkward.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2012's comic on:


Tags #big business, #business ethics, #executive program, #relocate, #vindictive, #stress, #loser, #turn down opportunity, #train, #discomfort, #underlings

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You've been selected for our executive development program. That means we can make you relocate to any godforsaken dirt stain we want. As soon as you make friends or find romance, we'll move you to someplace new and worse. It won't be the sort of work you'll enjoy, and the stress might kill you. If you turn down this opportunity, the company will forever label you as a loser. If you accept the offer, the company will train you to find pleasure in the discomfort of your underlings. I'm doing it right now! Dilbert: I HATE MY LIFE!!! Boss: Yes, yes, say more.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 11, 2012's comic on:


Tags #arrogant, #awesomeness, #deep undertsnding, #meetings, #moral obligation, #no kill switch, #reports, #tecnology, #tone down

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm getting reports that you're being arrogant in meetings. Dilbert: That's because I have a deep understanding of technology and a moral obligation to keep simpletons from ruining the world. Boss: Maybe you could tone it down. Dilbert: There's no kill switch on awesome.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #correlations, #predicted outcomes, #problem, #enormous ceo compensation, #myth, #control over profits, #awkward, #trap door, #ceo trick, #violent

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I did a study of our past business plans and found something. There's no correlation between our predicted and actual outcomes. That might be a problem for you. Your enormous CEO compensation is based on the myth that you have some control over our profitability. CEO: Ha! Dilbert: Ha! CEO: Is it just me or is this awkward? Dilbert: No, I'm feeling it too.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #buckingham palace, #princess, #kiss, #frog, #witch's, #curse, #lady di, #hideous, #creatures, #awkward, #Family, #reunions

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a chair and Dogbert the Frog sits next to him. Dogbert says into the telephone, "Hello . . . Buckingham Palace? I was wondering if the Princess would be willing to kiss a frog and remove a witch's curse for us." Dogbert says into the phone, "Oh . . . Lady Di does not kiss hideous little creatures . . ." Dogbert says, "That must be mighty awkward at family reunions . . . Hello?" Dilbert covers his eyes.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 27, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #woman, #self deprication, #utter, #turn, #silly, #hard

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks down the office hallway and thinks, "Forgot my keys." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to slap my forehead and mutter when I turn around, otherwise I'll look silly." As two people watch, Dilbert smacks himself and his glasses fly off his head. Dilbert thinks, "Too hard."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 01, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #world, #worse, #been, #born, #wait, #turn, #computer, #every, #night, #electricity, #meaning, #life, #today, #bedroom, #light, #day

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "Would the world be any worse off if I'd never been born?" Dilbert thinks, "Wait . . . If not for me, who would turn off this computer every night. I'm saving electricity!" Dilbert arrives at home carrying his briefcase and says to Dogbert, "I found meaning in my life today." Dogbert says, "You left your bedroom light on all day."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #tina, #meetings, #work, #friday, #brain, #dead, #productive, #late

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, the Boss and two people sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "I don't know why we even bother holding meetings on Friday afternoons . . ." Dilbert continues, "I mean, everybody is brain-dead by now. Is this really productive?" A woman reads a document and says, "Hmm . . . Productive? . . . Hmm . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I'm too late."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #ad, #man, #turn, #negatives, #perceived, #benefits, #shmultz, #beer, #head, #pounds, #bikini, #concept, #lonely, #Men

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands in front of two men and points to a diagram. Dogbert says, "We must turn the negatives of your project into perceived benefits." Dogbert continues, "The new slogan will be 'Shmultz Beer: you know it's working because your head pounds.'" Dogbert points to a picture of a man who is holding a beer and has a headache. A man asks, "Can you work some bikinis into this concept?" The other man says, "We're very lonely men."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #sarcasm, #Dilbert, #warrior, #battle, #memos, #meetings, #image, #eternity, #life, #pathetic, #help

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of the dresser mirror tying his necktie and Dogbert sits on the bed. Dogbert says, "The mighty warrior prepares for battle . . ." Dogbert continues, "Today, bold memos will be written, dangerous meetings will be attended, and many a photocopied image will be captured for eternity." Dilbert says, "If it weren't for sarcasm, my life would sound pathetic." Dogbert replies, "Glad to help."