Miss Comic Strips - Page 2
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68 Results for Miss
View 11 - 20 results for miss comic strips. Discover the best "Miss" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday June 27,
2005
Tags #ceo, #limo, #miss pennington, #harold, #rat bert, #surgery, #medical
Transcript
Ratbert the CEO "Miss Pennington, have my driver fetch the limo." "My name isn't Miss Pennington. It's Harold." "And?" "Um...and...I'll have it legally changed to Miss Pennington so you won't be wrong." "Plus the surgery."
Wednesday June 19,
2013
Tags #managers & supervisors, #obliviousness, #two ways to fail, #miss deadlines, #quality of work, #active non listening, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: You've given me so many projects that I have two ways to fail. I can either miss all of my deadlines or I can reduce the quality of my work to rubbish. Which do you prefer? Boss: The class I took in active non-listening is really paying off. I need this by Tuesday.
Thursday December 15,
2011
Tags #industry & manufacturing, #manufacturing, #more green, #ac units, #elastic bands, #hats covered eyes, #don't shoot messenger, #elbonian, #engineering
Transcript
Boss: We told our Elbonian factory to be more green, so they turned off their AC units. The heat caused the elastic bands in their hats to stretch until their eyes were covered. And that's why we'll miss our ship date. CEO: They say you shouldn't shoot the messenger, but no one warns you how much you'll want to.
Friday September 15,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #social anxiety, #fire alarm, #manners, #grins
Transcript
Dilbert walks down the hallway thinking, "Oh, crap. This is the third time today that I will walk by this same guy in the hall. I barely know him." Dilbert continues thinking, "This is so awkward. The first time, I said 'hello.' The second time we both made those closed-mouth grins and arched our eyebrows. What do I do the third time?" Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . So I pulled the fire alarm." Dogbert says, "I don't think Miss Manners is gonna back you on this one."
Wednesday September 26,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #death, #therapist, #sorrow, #bottled, #legally, #inherit, #humans
Transcript
Dogbert lies on a couch and says to a therapist, "I haven't been able to cry over Dilbert's death." The psychologist takes notes. Dogbert continues, "I really miss him, but I keep my sorrow bottle inside." The psychiatrist asks, "Did you know that dogs can't legally inherit from humans?" Dogbert bawls.
Thursday March 21,
1991
Monday April 29,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #cerberus, #honor, #attention, #preppared, #challenge, #death, #monkeys, #winged
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Ask my secretary to schedule a meeting." Dilbert thinks, "Groan." Dilbert kneels in front of the secretary's desk and says, "Uh . . . Excuse me . . . Excuse me . . . Miss Cerberus, could a humble employee have the honor of your attention?" The secretary yells, "Are you prepared to take the challenge of death?!!" Dilbert asks, "Does this involve any winged monkeys?"
Wednesday May 01,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #secretary, #cerberus, #calendar, #head, #willy, #mail, #boy, #choice, #bowling
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, ". . . So, then my boss's secretary, Miss Cerberus, says she won't put me on the calendar unless I bring her the HEAD of Willy the Mail Boy." Dilbert holds out a bag with something round in it and says, "What choice did I have?" Dogbert's ears fly up in shock. Dilbert says, "I went bowling." Dogbert looks angry.
Friday August 06,
1993
Tags #ratbert, #Dilbert, #computer
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert says, "I'd miss you if the human race died from pollution but rats lived on." Ratbert continues, "So I'm dedicating my life to learning the science of preserving humankind." Dilbert asks, "Conservation?" Ratbert replies, "Pickling."
Sunday May 21,
1989
Tags #book, #dog, #pet, #sick, #animals, #medical
Transcript
A woman walking down the sidewalk drops something. Dilbert bends over to pick it up and says, "Excuse me, miss!" The woman turns around and thinks, "Uh oh . . ." Dilbert says, "You dropped this little book titled 'Attractive Women's Secret Guide to Avoiding Dilbert.'" Dilbert says, "Wait a minute! I KNEW there had to be some kind of conspiracy!!" Dilbert opens the book and says, "If I can break this code, it will cripple their entire operation!" The woman shouts into a walkie talkie, "Mayday!!! Mayday!!!" Dilbert points at the woman and says, "Dogbert, sic!!!" Dogbert replies, "Sick? No, but my nose is a bit dry . . ."