Mock Comic Strips - Page 2
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23 Results for Mock
View 11 - 20 results for mock comic strips. Discover the best "Mock" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday September 14,
1989
Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, junk mail, mail, condo, sales, jeep cherokee, emerald
Transcript
Dilbert reads a piece of mail and says, "Wow! And I thought this was just more junk mail!" Dilbert sits in his chair and says to Dogbert, "All I have to do is drive two hours and listen to their condo sales pitch. I'm GUARANTEED to win a Jeep Cherokee or a valuable mock emerald." Dogbert responds, "That emerald will go pretty well with your mock brain."
Monday August 18,
1997
Tags task force, recruit, smartest college seniors, lie often, real life experince, meetings, parties
Transcript
The Boss tels Dilbert, "You'll be on the task force to recruit the smartest college seniors to work here." The Boss says, "Remember, don't lie often. And don't mock them for their lack of real life experience." The college student, unshaven, says, "so you're saying meetings are just like parties?" Dilbert replies, "Well, I'm not allowed to say orgy..."
Friday May 04,
2007
Monday March 10,
2008
Tags breakroom, coffee into wine, hay-soos, jesus, miracle, new employee, special powers, hair, bald
Transcript
Pronounced Hay-soos Wally: With a name like Jesus, I can't promise I won't mock you. Foop! Jesus: baldness be gone. Wally: I'm not lazy...and I can see! Jesus: Don't spill your wine."
Thursday May 20,
2010
Tags computer problem, human error, stupid, mock, cabbage
Transcript
The Boss says, "Was it human error?" Dilbert says, "I doubt it" Dilbert says, "No human would be that stupid. My best guess is that a cabbage got access to your computer." The Boss says, "Cabbbages can't use computers." Dilbert says, "Can they tell when they're being mocked?"
Saturday September 26,
2009
Tags manager, meeting, laughing, confused, angry, ridicule, criticism, embarrassed, business
Transcript
Man says, "Moving forward, we'll go after the low-hanging fruit at the end of the day." Dilbert says, "Ha ha!" Dilbert says, "I like the way you used humor to mock the vacuous way managers speak." Wally says, "Snork" Man says, "Which part was humor?" Dilbert says, "I'll just be quiet now."
Sunday July 19,
2009
Tags drinking, coffee, suggestion, mandatory, rant, yellign, screaming, ridiculous
Transcript
The boss says, "Did you see my suggestions for your presentation?" Dilbert says, "Yes, I rejected them." The boss says, "They aren't optional." Dilbert says, "Then why do you call them suggestions?" The boss says, "Sometimes I call things the wrong names to improve morale." DIlbert says, "You should just say what you're thinking. I can handle the truth." The boss says, "FIne. Make all of the changes I want, you ignorant hump." The boss says, "And do it now while I mock you with sleep noises." The boss says, "Baaaa! Baaaa! Baaaa!" Dilbert says, "Maybe your first way was better." The boss says, "No one will ever love you!"
Sunday March 14,
2010
Tags meeting, project, ship, software, bugs, objection, gray area, example, mock, robot from the future, annoyed, business, engineering
Transcript
The Boss says, "We start shipping in two weeks." Dilbert says, "That's not enough time to fix the known bugs." The Boss says, "When you say, 'bugs,' that's sort of a gray area." Dilbert says, "Um? I don't think it is." The Boss says, "For example, a user might need several steps to do something that should only take one." The Boss says, "Or perhaps the interface is a bit unclear." Dilbert says, "or perhaps it can only be operated by a robot from the future who jacks into it and sends commands in zeros and ones." The Boss says, "I can't tell if you're agreeing with me or mocking me." Dilbert says, "That's sort of a gray area."
Sunday July 11,
2010
Tags meeting, change, communicate, clear, moron, mock, tease, fuh, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "A successful transformation requires employees to feel ownership for the change." Alice says, "Change? What change?" Dilbert says, "Is there something we don't know?" The Boss says, "It's important that everyone has clear roles and responsibilities." Alice says, "What are you trying to tell us? Should we stop working on our projects?" The Boss says, "I'll keep you engaged and energized with my clear communication." The Boss says, "And as your leader, I will role-model the desired change." Alice says, "If he's our role model, I guess we need to act like morons who can't communicate." The Boss thinks, "I need new people." FUH FUH FUH FUH FUH FUH
Friday April 03,
2015
Dick Comments On Alice's Blog
Tags blog, comment, dick, internet, troll, personified, worked up, technology
Transcript
Man: Hi, I'm Dick, from the Internet. Do you have anything for me to mock? Alice: I'm leaving a comment on a blog. Man: Okay, got it. Alice: Can you take it out of context? Man: Shhh! I'm trying to get worked up over nothing.
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