Network Design Engineers Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

465 Results for Network Design Engineers

View 11 - 20 results for network design engineers comic strips. Discover the best "Network Design Engineers" comics from Dilbert.com.

Engineers Built Everything That Matters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Engineers Built Everything That Matters - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags engineers, importance, marketing, wages, pay scale, modern civilization, need both, marketing guy, business, money

View Transcript

Transcript

The Marketing Guy. Marketing Guy: I don't see why engineers get paid more than marketing professionals. Dilbert: Maybe because engineers designed and built every important part of modern civilization and all you did was misrepresent it. Marketing Guy: My point is that you need both. Dilbert: You really don't.

Brainstorm With Other Engineers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brainstorm With Other Engineers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags product design, managers, marketing, simplicity, complication, inventions, ideas, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?

Change To Bad Design

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Change To Bad Design - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags link, traffic, design, color, Opinion, obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Can you make that link button blue instead of burnt orange? Dilbert: Yes, if you want people to click on it, and you thrive on bad design. Boss: I have an eye for design. Dilbert: And I have an elbow for music.

Network Is Slow

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Network Is Slow - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bandwidth, network, speed, nsfw, videos, internet, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why is our network so slow today? Dilbert: I'll check. Okay, it seems that 75 percent of the staff is viewing inappropriate videos. Boss: That's all I wanted to do, too.

Winning Design Awards

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Winning Design Awards - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags design, fragile, cell phone, crack, screen, evil, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: 100 percent of our smartphone buyers dropped and broke their phones within one minute of unboxing them. Despite our slippery materials and brittle design, customers blamed themselves. And we won seven prestigious design awards. CEO: Yes!

Finding Qualified Engineers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Finding Qualified Engineers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, interview, questions, job market, engineers, baker, mortuary, assistant

View Transcript

Transcript

interview boss: it's hard to find qualified engineers in this job market, so i'm casting a wider net. it says here you have experience as a mortuary assistant and baker. that's not exactly like being an engineer, but i want to stay open-minded. tell me about a time you had to deal with failure and what you did about it. interviewee: well, one time i totally botched an embalming. so i used a chainsaw to reduce the corpse to flushable parts. i told the family he came back to life and ran away. boss: okay. and why did you become a baker? interviewee: so i cold eat my mistakes.

Package Design

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Package Design  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, vp of sales, technology, sales, selling, design, proposal, package, jump, roof, crazy, sarcasm, face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i got feedback on the proposed package design. our vp of sales says if we go with this design, he will "jump off the roof." alice: is he crazy or just good at selling? dilbert: no way to tell.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computers & peripherals, fraternization, friends with ghots, ghandi, ghost personal page, ghosts, heaven, internet & world wide web, llincoln, satellite pictures, social media, social network, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Our new product will be a social network for people who want to be friends with ghosts. We'll post satellite pictures on each ghost's personal page and say the photos were taken from heaven. Man: Abraham Lincoln posted new pictures. Woman: I'm chatting with Gandhi! Later.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags engineers, vaccinnations, wicked case, disease, heat, every seven years, kill me!

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My doctor says I have a wicked case of Pop Farr. Its when vulcans and engineers go into gear every seven years. Alice: Im pretty sure, I don't care but let me check my calendar just in case... Alice: Someone kill me! Now Now! Now! continued

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, engineers, lust, pon farr cycle, irreversible urge, mating season, engineer mating season, spawn, prodcut, unnecessary steps, rarely happens, specifications, vague

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina says, "Did you hear that Dilbert and Alice are on the same Pon Farr cycle?" Carol says, "What?" Tina says, "Every seven years, engineers have an irresistible urge to mate. Their spawn would be the product of two engineers." There's a reason it rarely happens Dilbert says, "Your plan has unnecessary steps!" Alice says, "Your specifications are vague!"