One Cell Organism Comic Strips - Page 2
1000 Results for One Cell Organism
View 11 - 20 results for one cell organism comic strips. Discover the best "One Cell Organism" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 21, 2011's comic on:
Noise: Ring. Dilbert: Uh-oh. It's never good when my phone rings after 4 pm. Caller ID is blocked. Someone must know that I would ignore the call if I knew who it was. If it weren't urgent, it would be email. This must be some sort of horrible issue that will cause me to work all night. It stopped. There's still a chance that I'll be okay unless my cell phone... Noise: Bzzzz. Dilbert: GAAAA!! I hate my life! Alice: You're right. That was funny. Wally: Now I'll text him.
Share November 18, 2011's comic on:
Asok: My mother always told me to beware the bogeyman. Dilbert: That was bad parenting. There's no such thing as the bogeyman. Boss: I was one over par on every hole. Let me tell you all about it.
Share November 19, 2011's comic on:
Boss: I want to fire Wally, but I can't risk it. He says he's the only one who can program the Zeberpupin System. Catbert: Are you sure that's true? Boss: It must be. No one else has even heard of it.
Share January 16, 2012's comic on:
Lawyer: I've been asked to settle your claim of discrimination against the company. Your complaint is that they discriminate against you for being short, bald, and nearsighted. I might have a conflict of interest, but my final offer is one billion dollars. Wally: Plus a statue and an apology. Company lawyer.
Share February 22, 2012's comic on:
Co-worker: You never answer when I call your cell. Wally: My battery is dead. Co-worker: Maybe you should charge it for once. Wally: I don't have time for that. Co-worker: What do you do all day that makes you so busy? Wally: For starters, I have this conversation a lot.
Share May 15, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: Do you want me to put the chart on one page, which would make the text too small for you to see? Or do you prefer a multiple-page approach that is confusing and unpersuasive? Boss: It's probably better if no one can read it. Dilbert: I won't bother using real words.
Share July 08, 2012's comic on:
Boss: Let's brainstorm new product ideas. Remember, the most important rule of brainstorming is no criticizing. Dilbert: I'll go first. Research shows that brainstorming is less effective than people working by themselves and later comparing ideas. My idea is to use stem cell technology to design bosses who aren't ignoramuses. Remember, you're not supposed to criticize ideas. But if you decide to do it anyway, it sort of proves my point. I understand whey brainstorming has a bad reputation, but it doesn't stop me from enjoying it.
Share June 19, 1990's comic on:
Dogbert stands in a cage thinking, "No stupid dog pound can hold me for long." Dogbert yells to the dog catcher, "Hey, screw! Don't I get one phone call?!" Dogbert whispers into the telephone, "Hello, is this the Big Ball Demolition Company? . . . Good, I have a rush job for you . . ."
Share August 31, 1990's comic on:
Dilbert lies on a couch in a psychiatrist's office. The therapist says, "Frankly, I'm tired of hearing your little problems . . ." The psychologist says, "I hate my job . . . I haven't had a decent date in a year . . . My biological clock is ticking away . . ." Dilbert asks, "Would it be unethical to date one of your patients?" The doctor replies, "Yes, especially an ugly one."
Share April 24, 1991's comic on:
A television reporter holds a microphone and says, "I'm standing at the Wickford wheat fields outside of London, the site of mysterious giant circles, possibly caused by aliens." The reporter asks a man with a backpack, "How do you find these circles of crushed wheat?" The man answers, "My team of experts starts at one point and searches outward until . . ." The man looks behind him where a circle of people tramples the wheat field. He cries, "Good Lord! Another circle has formed around us!!"