Q Tip Comic Strips - Page 2
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View 11 - 20 results for q-tip comic strips. Discover the best "Q Tip" comics from Dilbert.com.
Asok the Intern sits at the conference table between the Boss and Dilbert. Asok says, "Per marketing's request, I did an O.R.D. for the B.G.G. that resulted in a Q.R.B." Dilbert and Alice listen as Asok continues, "Then I discovered that marketing uses those acronyms for different things." Asok says, "Their version doesn't require nudity, just to pick one example." The Boss puts his hands to his face in frustration.
Man says, "I have a great stock tip for you, Alice." Alice says, "And I should trust you because you're an expert on all things except your own ridiculous hair?" Man says, "I also know a lot about old cars." Alice says, "Shocker."
dilbert: i took allergy meds last night, and now i have brain fog. my i.q. is about 50% of normal capacity. boss: whoo-hoo! i'm smarter than an engineer! dilbert: not quite. i'm only down by 50%.
dilbert: i have brain fog from the meds i took last night. my i.q. is down by 50%, but i make up for it by being handsome. alice: sounds more like a 75% situation. dilbert: now, can someone remind me of my name?
tina: i have a complaint about the men in the office. catbert: all of them? tina: yes, they're all stupid pigs. catbert: can you be more specific? tina: okay, they're basically visayan warty pigs in the i.q. range of 20 to 40.
Dilbert: He's been like this since our CEO made him drink a glass of our industrial sludge at a press conference. It looped a few points off his I.Q., but he's still has a bright future in quality assurance or maybe marketing. And with his new tail he'd be an awesome zip line guide.
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table in a restaurant. The waiter hands Dilbert the check and says, "I've taken the liberty of calculating a twenty-percent tip." The server continues, "It's written on the back next to a picture of a smiling diner . . . A fifteen-percent tip is shown by the picture of a guilty-looking diner." The waiter continues, "Below that is a picture of a diner and his dog with salad forks in their backs . . ."
Dogbert: Venture capitalists gave us $10 million, but I had to agree to put one ion them on board. TED: Should I be worried that your other board members have a combined I.Q of about 70? Dogbert: They weren't dumb enough to give me $10 million dollars. alligator: Burn!
The Boss, Dilbert and a male employee sit around a conference table. The Boss says, "Okay, so we shipped a million keyboards that don't have the letter 'Q.' What do we do?" The man says, "We could offer free upgrades to users who can prove they need a 'Q.'" The Boss asks, "How many users need a 'Q?'" The man answers, "Well . . . there's the royal family . . ."