Rich People Comic Strips - Page 2
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1000 Results for Rich People
View 11 - 20 results for rich people comic strips. Discover the best "Rich People" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 23,
2018
Cryogenic Investment Firm
Tags cryogenic, intelligence, rich people
Transcript
Narrator: Dogbert's Cryogenic Investment Firm. Dogbert: We'll freeze your brain for 200 years and then transplant it into a 3-D printed body. By then, your investments will be worth a fortune. Man: Is there any risk to my brain? Dogbert: You'll have an IQ of 45, but that doesn't matter when you're rich.
Thursday January 12,
2012
Tags gloating, rich people, leadership experts, brag about weath, comforatble
Transcript
Boss: Leadership experts say I should never brag about my wealth. Let's just say I'm "comfortable." So very, very comfortable. Alice: Yeah, this isn't working.
Tuesday January 17,
2012
Tags actions & defenses, billion dollars, business ethics, golden key, rich people, top 1%, flying unicorn
Transcript
Boss: Here's a billion dollars to settle your claim of discrimination against short, bald, nearsighted guys. Wally: I'm in the top 1% now. I wonder where we hold our secret meetings. Boss: Ask the tiny flying unicorn with the golden key.
Wednesday January 18,
2012
Tags clubs, meetings, rich people, tiny flying unicron, commodities, 1% club, imagination, Entertainment
Transcript
Wally: A tiny flying unicorn gave me this key. Guard: Grab a snout and a hat. We're just about to manipulate the commodities market. Wally: Is it my imagination or everything a little bit better here?
Thursday January 19,
2012
Tags rich people, discrimination stellement, lazy, unscupulous, mirror
Transcript
Dilbert: I expected you to quit after you got your billion-dollar discrimination settlement. Wally: Just because I'm lazy and unscrupulous, why would you assume I'm also a quitter? Dilbert: I... um... Wally: I don't know how you look at yourself in the mirror.
Saturday January 21,
2012
Tags dating, rich people, top 1%, Women, sisters, hot, attraction, co worker, relationships
Transcript
Wally: Now that I'm a top one-percenter, I wonder what kind of women I'll attract. Do you have any sisters back home? I'm asking because you'd be totally hot if you were a woman. So I'm thinking hoo-ah! Asok: I cannot count the number of ways this is wrong.
Thursday September 13,
2012
Tags rich people, stock market, victims, insider training, victimless crime, rose bushes, gardner, money
Transcript
CEO: I did some insider trading and totally got away with it. It felt great! It was a victimless crime so I feel no guilt whatsoever. Dogbert: Do you know what victimless means? CEO: Yes. It's like the time I strangled my gardener for overwatering the rose bushes. Dogbert: I see the problem.
Monday September 24,
2012
Tags cold desperation, drab, grimy habitat, meaningless, pile of money, poor persons, rich people, roll in money, underling
Transcript
CEO: Uh-oh. I'm lost and I've wandered into the grimy habitat of an underling. I feel the cold desperation of your drab and meaningless life. I need to roll in money to get the smell off me. Where's the nearest pile?
Monday October 15,
2012
Tags poor persons, rich people, homely, middle class, capitalism
Transcript
CEO: I don't know how to say this delicately so I'll just say it. Looking at your homely, middle-class face makes my skin crawl. Never speak directly to me again. Sometimes I think they don't understand capitalism.
Friday December 07,
2012
Tags jewelry, rich people, expensive watch, entire net worth, ceo, employee
Transcript
Asok: Holy moly! Your watch costs more than my entire net worth. CEO: Thank you. Asok: This isn't a "thank you" situation. CEO: You're welcome?


