Secretly Subcontract Comic Strips - Page 2
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14 Results for Secretly Subcontract
View 11 - 14 results for secretly subcontract comic strips. Discover the best "Secretly Subcontract" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 02,
2003
Tags #pointy haired, #takeover, #should report, #secret got out, #extra money
Transcript
"Our goal is nothing less than a complete takeover of pointy-haired Carl's software division." "We'll start secretly doing their jobs in addition to our own. Then I'll argue that they should report to me." "Hypothetically, if the secret got out, would we stop working twice as hard for no extra money?"
Sunday June 03,
2007
Tags #ceo's meeting, #boos, #Dilbert, #status on technology, #platform migration, #nothing to hide, #100 drunken clowns, #beed in their underpants, #decline in morale, #pretending tow ork, #get fired, #hide things
Transcript
CEO Meeting The Boss: "I brought Dilbert in case you have any technical questions." CEO: "What's the status on the technology platform migration project?" The Boss: "Be completely honest. We have nothing to hide." Dilbert: "Well, okay." "The project is like a hundred drunken clowns with bees in their underpants." "I expect the decline in morale to lead to violence." "Most of us are only pretending to work while secretly hoping the project gets canceled after you get fired by the board." "It turns out that we did have a few things to hide."
Sunday July 19,
2015
Tags #public speaking, #presentation, #question, #questions, #stupid, #idiot, #idiots, #criticism, #critic
Transcript
Boss: I need you to critique my presentation for the board. And don't hold back to spare my feelings. Dilbert: That probably won't be an issue. Alice: We got this. Boss: My product idea has three components. Alice: How do you know another company isn't secretly preparing to launch the same product? Boss: What kind of stupid question is that? Alice: It's the same question you asked me yesterday about my product idea. Boss: The board won't ask that. Alice: Don't be so sure. I hear they're idiots.
Friday August 12,
2016
Wally Goes To His Man Cave
Tags #lactation, #man cave, #nursing, #deception, #baby, #trick
Transcript
Wally: I secretly turned our unused lactation room into my man cave. Dilbert: What if someone sees you go in? Tina: You said only once, right? Wally: Once per day.
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