Serial Idiot Comic Strips - Page 2

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151 Results for Serial Idiot

View 11 - 20 results for serial idiot comic strips. Discover the best "Serial Idiot" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 1995's comic on:


Tags #succeed, #competitors, #salary increases, #external competition, #idiot boy

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The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "We'll succeed if we understand who our competitors really are!" Wally says, "My competition is Dilbert and Alice, with whom I compete for salary increases and rare promotion opportunities." The Boss says, "I meant our external competition." Wally says, "Tell me again what we make." Dilbert whispers to Wally, "No raise for you, idiot boy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #underpants, #bought, #house, #capitalism, #dinosaur, #case, #case studies, #idiot, #computers

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The caption says, "Dilbert special! Bob the Dinosaur will rip the underpants off guys we hate!" Bob pulls the underwear off a man. The caption says, "Case #1." A man smoking a pipe and wearing a turtleneck says, ". . . Bought my first house for 75 cents. Sold it a year later for 400,000 dollars . . ." The man screams as Bob pulls his underwear off. Bob says, "Now he drives a 'Beemer.'" The caption says, "Case #2." A man says, "It's a great movie. You'll be surprised when you find out the parakeet is the murderer." The man screams as Bob pulls off his boxer shorts. Bob says, "I love surprises!" The caption says, "Case #3." A car salesman says, "Wait here and I'll try to convince my boss to sell the car at your price." The man screams when Bob pulls off his underwear. Bob says, "He's on your side!" The caption says, "Finally . . ." Dilbert says, "Only an idiot would thing computers are confusing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #awkward, #parties, #d'oeuvres, #included, #working, #losers, #living, #idiot

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Dilbert stands by himself with a cocktail glass in his hand. He thinks, "I feel so awkward at these office parties . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I've already walked back and forth to the hors d'oeuvres six times." Dilbert thinks, "I'll stand close to these two and hope they include me." The man and woman turn their backs to Dilbert. He thinks, "It's not working." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to find somebody who is alone." Dilbert thinks, "Hmm . . . All the people standing alone look like losers." Dilbert thinks, "I'll just say something . . . What have I got to lose?" He says to the Boss, "Hi." Dilbert says, "I'm Dilbert. Waht do you do for a living?" The Boss replies, "I'm your boss, idiot."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 17, 1996's comic on:


Tags #do math, #idiot, #monday and fridays, #shocking, #sick days, #idiot savant

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The secretary reads a document and says to the Boss, "Oh my! This is shocking!" The Boss asks, "What?" The secretary says, "40% of all sick days taken by your staff are Fridays and Mondays!" The Boss walks away saying, "What kind of idiot do they think I am?" The secretary says, "Not an idiot savant. They can do math."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 10, 1996's comic on:


Tags #career choices, #Dogbert, #helpless people, #insignificant insects, #occupational preference, #remove vital organs, #serial killer, #career counselor

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A man sits across from Dogbert's desk. Dogbert reads from a document and says, "According to your occupational preference test, you like to remove vital organs from helpless people." Dogbert continues, "That narrows the career choices to doctor or serial killer. Do you get along with other people?" The man replies, "Other people are insignificant insects." Dogbert responds, "We'll have to go to a tie-breaker question."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 1996's comic on:


Tags #idiot fell, #twelve hours, #chair safety training, #do, #not do

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The Boss says to Wally and Alice, "Some idiot stood on a chair and fell off." The Boss continues, "Now we all have to take twelve hours of chair safety training." Wally and Alice wince. During training Alice, Wally and the Boss watch a man standing on his head and spinning on a chair. The Boss whispers, "Is that a 'do' or a 'not do?'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 08, 1997's comic on:


Tags #work smarter, #not harder, #pay more work less, #frightened idiot

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The Boss thinks, "My old slogan was, 'Work smarter not harder.'" The Boss thinks, "But people kept leaving for companies that pay more for less work." The Boss stands behind Alice and says, "Work like a frightened idiot!" Alice says, "Catchy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 30, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #integrate, #bad technology, #idiot boss, #good etchnology, #throw away, #bad tech, #pure veil

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Dilbert sits at a desk with a computer on it. Dogbert sits atop the computer. Dilbert says, "It's my job to integrate the bad technology that our idiot boss bought with the good technology we already own. Your advice?" Dogbert waves his arms in the air, "Throw away the bad technology. Goof off until the next planned upgrade of the good technology. Tell your boss the improvements are a result of his brilliant buying decision." Dilbert says, "Wow. That's almost pure evil." Dogbert says, "You're welcome."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 23, 1998's comic on:


Tags #famous serial killers, #database, #name, #weapon, #tattoo, #killer application

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Asok the intern is making a presentation. He points to the display projected from his laptop computer and says, "My new product is a database of famous serial killers." Asok says, "You can search the database by name, weapon, or tattoo." Alice frowns. Alice turns to Wally and says, "Let me guess, Wally: Six months ago our young intern asked you what the term 'killer application' meant." The Boss looks on.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 27, 1998's comic on:


Tags #new cfo, #babbling idiot, #offcie, #dilbert questions

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The moron in messy suit stands in Dilbert's cubicle. The moron says, "Then we need tp PV the DCF and get the ROI to the EOC ASAP." Dilbert says, "Are you our new CFO or a babbling idiot who just happened to wander by?" The moron says, "Which one pays more?" Dilbert thinks, "The mystery deepens."