Share Knowledge Comic Strips - Page 2
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200 Results for Share Knowledge
View 11 - 20 results for share knowledge comic strips. Discover the best "Share Knowledge" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday October 28,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #natural, #mental, #peaks, #knowledge, #improve, #performance, #hourly, #temperature, #readings, #identify, #avoid
Transcript
Dogbert sits in a chair across from a man. Dogbert says, "Every person has natural daily rhythms of mental peaks and troughs. We can use this knowledge to improve your performance." Dogbert hands the man a thermometer and continues, "We use hourly body temperature readings to identify and avoid the troughs." As the man leans back in his chair and waves his arms, Dogbert writes, "One o'clock. We have encountered a severe trough. I fear it could be the dreaded 'El Nino' trough."
Monday March 22,
1993
Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #engineering, #knowledge, #promote, #prima donna, #demonstrate, #personality, #dissorders, #mumble, #disdain, #humanity
Transcript
Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Your engineering knowledge is good, but I can't promote you to 'prima donna.'" The Boss continues, ". . . Unless you demonstrate a few more serious personality disorders." Dilbert replies, "I can mumble." The Boss says, "Sure, but can you do it with disdain for all of humanity?"
Thursday March 25,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #deserve, #promoted, #technical, #unstable, #potentially, #dangerous, #knowledge
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "I'll prove I deserve to be promoted to 'Technical Prima Donna.'" Dilbert sprays the Boss with a fire extinguisher and says, "I think this shows that I'm emotionally unstable and potentially dangerous." Dilbert asks, "How was that?" The Boss says from under a pile of foam, "It was good. I'm starting to over-value your technical knowledge already."
Saturday May 21,
1994
Tags #change project, #actual knowledge, #changes, #voicemail
Transcript
The Boss: "We just had a meeting and decided to change your project substantially." "We didn't invite you to the meeting because things go smoother when nobody has any actual knowledge." Dilbert: "So, what are the changes?" The Boss: "If I remember, I'll leave you a voice mail."
Tuesday June 07,
1994
Tags #video conference, #desktop, #telecommuting, #level of professionalism, #share document, #next time
Transcript
"This desktop video conference thing is great!" "Even though you're telecommuting, you still maintain a level of professionalism." "Let's share a document next time."
Tuesday August 30,
1994
Tags #classes, #get mba, #big name school, #knowledge, #not prestige, #tonys, #house, #mbas, #babe ratio
Transcript
"I'm going to take classes at night and get an MBA." "I don't need a big-name school. I'm in this for knowledge, not prestige." "How about 'Tony's House of MBA's'?" "The babe ratio is better at 'MBA-O-RAMA'."
Friday September 02,
1994
Tags #classes at night, #eleven cheerios, #gaining knowledge, #knowledge, #work all day
Transcript
"I don't know how you do it. You work all day and now you take classes at night." "ZZZ" "It's hard, but you're gaining knowledge that couldn't be obtained any other way." "Whump" "Hey! I can hold eleven 'cheerios' in my nose!" "And it's knowledge you can apply."
Tuesday October 11,
1994
Tags #future trends, #guess, #more valid, #published, #share vision, #people are dumb
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm writing a book of my guesses about future trends. If it gets published then my guesses will seem more valid than other peoples. I'll charge huge fees to share my 'vision" with audiences. Dilbert: Why would people pay huge fees for guesses? Dogbert: Trend number one is that people aren't getting any smarter.
Friday January 20,
1995
Tags #dark side, #engineering, #technical knowledge, #generlaist, #easy path, #suite, #applications, #unnatural
Transcript
Phil stands behind Dilbert's desk and waves his hand and his spoon. Phil says, "Come to the dark side, Dilbert. Renounce engineering and become a manager." Dilbert says angrily, "NEVER!" Looking over Dilbert's shoulder, Phil says, "Your technical knowledge is getting stale. You're becoming a generalist . . . take the easy path." Phil is holding a set of software boxes. He says to Dilbert, "I brought you a suite of applications that ll work together." Dilbert yells, "THAT'S UNNATURAL!!! BE GONE!!!"
Wednesday March 15,
1995
Tags #stock, #shares, #timely leaks, #media, #value plunged, #sell now, #fair share price, #want copy, #Entertainment
Transcript
Dogbert sits at a conference table with the Boss and three other managers. Dogbert says, "Your stock was $30 per share when I offered to buy the company, but thanks to some timely leaks to the media your value has plunged." Dogbert continues, "However, if you sell right now I'll pay the full $30 for your stock." The Boss says, "I recommend we do it." A manager hands the signed contract back to Dogbert and says, "Done. $30 per share is more than fair." Dogbert replies, "Yeah, 'per share' would have been fair. Anybody want a copy?" The Boss looks shocked.