Sounds Bad Comic Strips - Page 2
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916 Results for Sounds Bad
View 11 - 20 results for sounds bad comic strips. Discover the best "Sounds Bad" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday May 07,
2020
Noble Bad Data
Tags accurate, bad, business, data, heroic, managers & supervisors, noble, war
Transcript
boss's voice coming from monitor: is the data accurate? dilbert at desk looking at boss on video conference: you don't go to war with the data you need. you go to war with the data you have. boss: did you just make it sound noble to use bad data? dilbert: and heroic.
Wednesday July 29,
2020
Bad Judge Of Character
Tags business, managers & supervisors, bad, judge, character, hire, termite, clothes, disguise, youtube, makeup, video
Transcript
boss wearing face mask: i'm starting to think i'm a bad judge of character. the last three people i hired turned out to be termite colonies in clothes. dilbert in face mask: how did they disguise the face part? boss: they learned from youtube makeup videos.
Friday December 18,
2020
Bad Attitude
Tags business, technology, work, exceptional, complain, attitude, bad, dislike, sarcasm
Transcript
boss: your work has been exceptional, but people are complaining about your attitude. dilbert: aren't the people who are doing the complaining usually the ones with bad attitudes. boss: they think you dislike them. dilbert: i do, but i have a terrific attitude about it.
Wednesday April 13,
2011
Tags appeal, bad person, business ethics, comparison shopping, guilt, molt, prevents competitors, raising prices
Transcript
Dilbert: Our products only appeal to people who aren't good at comparison shopping. But I justify it because our existence prevents competitors from raising prices. Am I a bad person? Dogbert: I molt a little bit every time you talk.
Monday May 02,
2011
Tags exhaustion / tiredness, office workers, peak efficeincy, brain, peak effiency, not working
Transcript
Dilbert: My brain isn't working at its peak efficiency this afternoon. Common sense says I should go home early to avoid making any mistakes that would be bad for the company. Unless... nothing I... do is important. Boss: Sounds like your brain is back to its peak efficiency.
Saturday January 15,
2011
Tags cruelty, managers & supervisors, couldn't be worse, bad idea, Funny, project is bad idea, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "How's everything going?" Dilbert says, "It couldn't be worse." Dilbert says, "I was the only person who said this project is a bad idea. Then you assigned it to me." The Boss says, "It's funnier when I make them say it." Dilbert says, "Grrrr"
Friday February 04,
2011
Tags bad time, governments unemployment stats, look for job, managers & supervisors, new job, employment, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "The government's new unemployment statistics are out." The Boss says, "It's still a bad time to look for a job." Dilbert says, "Yeah. I got that."
Saturday February 19,
2011
Tags anger, honesty, moving, new offcie, sounds weird, real one, save the attitude
Transcript
Wally says, "I can't help on your project this week because we're moving to a new office." Dilbert says, "It sounds weird because it's true." Wally says, "I like to throw in a real one every now and then." Wally says, "You might want to save that attitude for the next round."
Sunday March 06,
2011
Tags honesty, managers & supervisors, proactive, send email, bad time management, creating illuson, sarcasm, crazy boss, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "You need to be more proactive." Dilbert says, "I can only appear to be proactive if you stop telling me to do things I've already planned." The Boss says, "How am I supposed to know what you plan to do every minute?" Dilbert says, "I could send you an e-mail every time I have a thought." The Boss says, "I don't have time for that!" Dilbert says, "Apparently your bad time management is creating the illusion that I'm not proactive." Dilbert says, "I'll take the liberty of signing you up for a time management class." The Boss says, "Don't do that!" Dilbert says, "So...I should not be proactive?" The Boss says, "Just do what I want before I know I want it." Dilbert says, "I hope the next thing you want is sarcasm."
Wednesday June 01,
2011
Tags gloating, bad winner, office, co workers
Transcript
Coworker: do you remember six months ago when I told you you were wrong? EEE-YORE! EEE-YORE! EEE-YORE! I just realized Im a bad winner.