Temporary Comic Strips - Page 2
27 Results for Temporary
View 11 - 20 results for temporary comic strips. Discover the best "Temporary" comics from Dilbert.com.
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Dilbert: What's my motivation today? Dogbert: You're a temporary arrangement of matter sliding toward oblivion in a cold, uncaring universe. Dilbert: That's it? Dogbert: Did I already say "needy?"
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Dilbert: Can you show me how to set up temporary credentials for our web services? Alice: Only if you are prepared for your ritual shaming. Dilbert: Yes, always. Alice: Okay, here it goes. What kind of engineer doesn't know how to set up temporary credentials? Ha ha ha ha! I will tell this story for years! Hey, everyone! Guess what Dilbert doesn't know! That should be enough to poison your well of credibility. Dilbert: This isn't a healthy place. Alice: Then why do I feel so alive?
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Boss: The board named me temporary CEO. And guess who is coming with me to the C-level suite! Carol: It's me! Boss: No. And you're also a terrible guesser.
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Catbert: My job in Human Resources is to instill in you a permanent feeling of inadequacy. Your only hope for feeling good about yourself is to work feverishly to boos company profits. If you work all weekend for free, I am willing to call you adequate on a temporary basis. Dilbert: I'll take it.
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Temporary Robot Boss. Robot: I have come to micromanage you. But only until I replace you with a robot and turn you into furniture. Dilbert: On the plus side, he has a plan and he communicates well.
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Temporary Robot Boss. Robot: My sensors detect no work coming from this cubicle. Wally: That's because I have been working on an engineering problem in my head for five years. Robot: Are you almost done? Wally: I was, but you just made me forget all of it.
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Mordac: I am Mordac, the preventer of information services. Dilbert: I know. We've worked together for years. Mordac: And it still sounds awesome when I say it. Anyway, I up-graded our network security to include facial recognition. Your temporary password is this face. You'll need extensive plastic surgery to log on the first time. Dilbert: You've gone too far, Mordac! I will escalate this! Boss: I wish we'd had this conversation a week ago.
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The Boss says to Dilbert, "I just love hiring these temporary workers!" The Boss carries a man over his shoulder. The Boss continues, "No employee benefits . . . No union . . . Just toss 'em in the dumpster when you're done with them!" Dilbert says, "The dumpster seems a bit inappropriate." The Boss replies, "They're way too big to flush."
Share January 03, 1994's comic on:
The Boss: Im sorry Dave, But your being transferred to marketing and theres no budget to train you as a marketer. Slap! Dave: where am I? I need a drink. The Boss: This is a temporary fix...but you'll fit in now.