Tractor Sized Mp3 Players Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

32 Results for Tractor Sized Mp3 Players

View 11 - 20 results for tractor sized mp3 players comic strips. Discover the best "Tractor Sized Mp3 Players" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #manager, #mp3, #obliviousness, #outsourcing, #product, #quality, #trade off, #elbonian factory, #mp3 player

View Transcript

Transcript

"Here's our prototype from the Elbonian factory." "Well, I'm no expert, but this is obviously a good one of these." "It's an mp3 player." "We used to call them plumber's helpers!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #outsourcing, #design, #communication, #miscommunication, #manufacturing, #obliviousness, #marketing, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

We ship our new mp3 player in two days. How's the Elbonian factory coming along? "The prototype is the size of a small tractor and it will only play Elbonian polkas." "I'll budget a little extra for marketing." "It's made of asbestos."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #angelica jolie lips, #mp3 player, #must never soeak

View Transcript

Transcript

The Marketing Guru "Your mp3 player is large and scary, but I can fix that." "All it needs is a set of Angelina Jolie lips and everyone will love it." Six Months Later "We must never speak of this."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #imagination, #experince, #email, #boss, #hurts brain, #think about it, #team players, #new projects, #form of evil, #people squander it

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "Is it my imagination or am I doing your job, plus mine?" Wally says, "That's not your imagination, Asok." Wally says, "It's a little thing I call experience." Wally says, "Once a week, I e-mail our pointy-haired boss and ask him a question." Wally says, "I make the question so complicated that it hurts his brain." The Boss says, "Ow! Ow! Ow!" Wally says, "He'll spend the rest of the week avoiding me so he doesn't need to think about it." Wally says, "Meanwhile he seeks out team players and hammers them with new projects." Asok says, "So... experience is a form of evil?" Wally says, "Not always. Some people squander it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blue jeans, #ceo tries average, #chauffer, #dressed as fox, #drove tractor, #fox hunt, #helicopter, #interns, #ironic, #real work, #roll sleeve, #like secretary

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "Our CEO will be joining us in a minute." The Boss continues, "As usual, he'll be making an awkward attempt to seem like 'just plain folk.'" The CEO enters. He points to the chair next to Wally and says, "Excuse me - is this ordinary chair available for an average guy like me?" The CEO rolls up his sleeves and says, "I'll roll up my sleeves and get to work. I'm not too good for real work." The CEO turns to Alice and says, "I have a secretary, but it's almost as if I work for her. Ha ha! It's ironic." The CEO says, "Last weekend I wore blue jeans and drove a tractor!" A driver approaches the CEO and says, "Sir, your helicopter is here to take you to your island fortress for the fox hunt." The CEO turns to the meeting and says, "Itty bitty fortress." The driver adds, "The interns are already in full fox costumes."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #television, #network, #reports, #stories, #Games, #yesterday, #millionaires, #problems, #darryl, #brain, #crime

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says, "I'm going to start up a television news network that only reports happy stories." Dogbert sits at a news desk and says, "In sports, fifty percent of the teams won their games yesterday and all the players are millionaires - most of whom have no serious drug problems." Dogbert continues, "Our person of the week is Darryl, who, despite his tiny brain, found success through a life of crime." In the corner of the tv screen there is a picture of a man holding a bag of money and hugging a woman in front of a palm tree.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stake through heart, #demon mossed boss, #raisin sized heart, #blue betty pen

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Wally stand against the wall on either side of the door to Ted's office. Dilbert says, "Alice is ready to drive a stake through the heart of our demon-possessed boss." Wally and Dilbert hide in the hallway. From inside the office, they hear, "Whack, whack, whack!" Ted and Alice walk out the office door. Ted has many pens stuck in his chest. He says, "It's times like these when I'm glad my heart is the size of a raisin!" Alice says to Wally, "I need all of your pens, including 'Blue Betty.'" Wally's mouth hangs open in shock.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ego, #pointy haired boss, #standing in offcie, #thimble sized morale, #tic tac container, #protect

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert tells Wally, ". . . So our pointy-haired boss put me in charge of your project . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . Because I was standing in his office when he thought about the project." Dilbert says, "If it makes you feel better, you can keep your morale in this thimble with mine." Wally replies, "I keep mine in a 'Tic Tac' container with my ego."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #merging, #porcess, #engineers, #merger, #tech writers

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Tina and Wally sit in conference. The Boss says, "We'll be destroying another healthy company via a process we call merging." The Boss says, "No engineers will be down-sized after merger." The Boss says to Tina, "And tech writers..." Tina says, "Yes?!" The Boss says, "Should write that down."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tina tech writer, #downsized, #merger, #experiment, #bleed like engineers, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: "Tina the tech writer." Tina says to The Boss, "Why must the tech writers be down-sized after the merger?" Tina says, "If you prick us, do we not bleed like engineers?" The Boss says to Dilbert in front of Tina, "What kind of experiment?"