Two Critter Special Comic Strips - Page 2

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View 11 - 20 results for two critter special comic strips. Discover the best "Two Critter Special" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #lab rat, #escape, #laboratory, #embassy, #rat, #special, #treatment

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Lab rat: Greetings, dog. I've come to live in your house and escape from my job at the laboratory. You could think of me as a political exile seeking sanctuary in a friendly embassy. Dogbert: I could think of you as a rat. Lab rat: Okay, but I don't expect any special treatment.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ed, #television, #television repair, #Dilbert, #knock, #pills, #medication, #busy

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Dilbert: I'd fix it myself but I know it takes special tools... Plus I would just have to order a part... And I'm pretty busy... Ed: Take two of these... Dilbert: "Engineer's pills?" Ed: They'll knock you out until I'm gone.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #bottle, #wine, #distinctive, #special, #destined, #cork, #sniffers, #Dogbert, #love

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Dilbert tells Dogbert, "To me, a woman is like a fine bottle of wine." Dilbert explains, "Each one is familiar, yet distinctive and special." Dogbert says, "In the wine of life, some people are destined to be cork-sniffers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dinosaurs, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #special, #bob, #animal behavior, #birds, #careless

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Dogbert walks down the stairs holding a gadget. Dogbert says, "If Dilbert wanted me to have this when he died it must have been special to him. But what is it?" Bob the Dinosaur says, "We dinosaurs have a method for handling things we don't understand." Dogbert says, "Tell me." Bob replies, "We stomp it to bits and evolve into birds who don't care."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #two-bean, #salad, #smothered, #island, #dressing, #bench

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit on a bench. Dilbert says, "I was so poor that all I could afford to eat was two-bean salad." Dogbert replies, "Sounds awful . . ." Dilbert says, "It wasn't that bad . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . Of course, I always smothered it with hundred island dressing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #women's, #power, #organization, #two, #billion, #Dilbert

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Dilbert opens his door to two women. One woman says, "Hi, we're with the 'Women's Power Organization.' Do you have a moment?" The woman hits Dilbert in the stomach and his glasses fly off his face. Dilbert lies in the doorway. As they walk away one woman asks, "How many are left?" The other woman replies, "Two billion."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #important, #part, #serves, #two, #tennis, #racket

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Dilbert holds a tennis racket and tosses a tennis ball. The instructor says, "Good. The toss is the most important part of . . ." Dilbert misses the ball and it bounces on his head. Dilbert brings his racket down on the instructor's head. Dilbert asks, "Is this why you get two serves?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #chef, #Dogbert, #park bench, #two, #years, #brother, #jail, #dishonest, #judge, #cook, #Family, #sarcasm

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Dogbert sits on a park bench next to a chef. The chef says, "I haven't been able to get a job in two years." The chef continues, "It's because everybody knows my brother is in jail. People think I must be dishonest too." The chef concludes, "You should not judge a cook by its brother." Dogbert replies, "He probably says the same about you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pregnancy & child birth, #the boss, #alice, #xerox, #birth, #job, #special, #treatment

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The Boss sits at his desk and says, "Alice, I noticed you gave birth by the Xerox machine this morning . . ." The Boss continues, "We don't have a maternity leave policy here, but if you need some time, I'm sure we can find somebody less fertile to fill your job." Alice replies, "Thank you, sir, but I don't expect any special treatment." Alice is breast feeding a baby under her shirt.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #car, #salesman, #Dogbert, #lying, #part, #crime, #pay, #retired, #readers digest, #special, #story

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I quit my job as a used car salesman." Dilbert asks, "Because you couldn't keep lying?" Dogbert replies, "No, the lying was good. I liked that part." Dilbert asks, "Was it because crime doesn't pay?" Dogbert says, "I made $400,000 this week. I'm retired now." Dilbert says, "I don't think this will ever be a 'Reader's Digest' very special story."