Weekly Sessions Comic Strips - Page 2
17 Results for Weekly Sessions
View 11 - 17 results for weekly sessions comic strips. Discover the best "Weekly Sessions" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share December 01, 1996's comic on:
Catbert stands at his desk thinking, "My tail is twitching . . ." Catbert thinks, "That can only mean it's time to write some more evil policies." Catbert types, "To: all employees. Subject: new policy." Dilbert gets the e-mail message and reads, "Employees must wear shoes that are one size smaller than their feet." Alice reads, "This will reduce wear and tear on carpets by five percent." Catbert thinks, "This is my favorite part." He types, "We must do this to be competitive." A woman enters Catbert's office and says, "I'm a reporter for 'Evil HR Policies Weekly.' Do you have any success stories?" Catbert purrs. The caption says, "This is how industry practices are born." The journalist asks, "Has anyone complained about the 'Footsizing' program?" Catbert replies, "I haven't listened to a single complaint."
Share February 02, 1999's comic on:
Dilbert is in a metting with another man and a woman. The man says, "We didn't include engineers in the product planning sessions because.... um.. because...." The woman says, "Because we were art history majors in college." The man says, "Par-r-r-r-rty!" The woman says, "How soon can you build the cloak of invisibility?" The man says, "Let the man think, Clover."
Share October 19, 2000's comic on:
The boss is sitting across from a terrified looking person. The boss says, "I understand that you were raised in a dysfunctional family." The man says, "Yes" The boss yells, "You're gonna work seventy hours a week or you're worthless!!" The man says, "You love me." The boss says, "Are there any more like you at home?"
Share January 10, 2006's comic on:
Welcome to Dogbert's Retirement Planning Seminar. "Don't tell anyone that you retired. Just keep coming to work and collecting money for the weekly lottery pool. Then spend it on food." "I want my dollar back."
Share March 12, 2010's comic on:
Wally says, "I couldn't work this week because my workspace has bad Feng Shui." Wally says, "I know Feng Shui is a real thing because our CEO hired a Feng Shui consultant to design his office." Wally says, "Do you agree, or are you saying that our CEO is a superstitious simpleton?"
Share June 18, 2010's comic on:
Tina says, "I can't stop buying phone apps that I don't need. Am I crazy?" Therapist says, "Yes, you are totally batspit crazy. You'll need many sessions." Therapist says, "Steve Jobs isn't the only one who can do marketing."
Share October 14, 2001's comic on:
The Boss approaches Carol and says, "Carol, if anyone calls, say I'm in a meeting." Carol asks, "What meeting?" The Boss replies, "It doesn't matter." Carol thinks, "#O!* vague instructions" as the phone rings. Carol says into the phone, "He's at his weekly meeting of 'Morons Anonymous.' She continues on the phone, "It's a long meeting. They usually get into an argument about the definition of 'anonymous.' She continues on the phone, "Half of them think it means 'angry.' Then someone throws a chair and it's pandemonium." She continues on the phone, "The whole thing usually ends with a shoe-sniffing contest." The Boss returns to Carol's desk. She says, "Your mom called."