April 2005 Comic Strips - Page 2
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Character
Monday April 11,
2005
Tags trump, free stuff, resources, free samples, rich people, marketing campaign
Transcript
Dilbert: How can I create a marketing campaign if my boss doesn't give me any resources? Dogbert: "Try giving free samples to people who look like celebrities." Dilbert: "And you would be?" TRUMP: "Donald trump. Give me some free stuff."
Tuesday April 12,
2005
Tags marketing campiagn, free samples, worked, decline, intelligence, conclusion, marketing, business
Transcript
Dilbert: "My marketing plan involved giving free samples of our cruddy product to celebrity lookalikes." "The fact that it worked caused a steep decline in my respect for the intelligence of people." "In conclusion, there's a fine line between marketing and hating."
Wednesday April 13,
2005
Tags worlds greatest intern, plagues, bought plague, less prominent placement, alice called it
Transcript
ASOK: "Alice, you are looking at the newest member of "the world's greatest interns." Alice: "That's a scam to convince gullible interns to buy overpriced wall plaques." Asok: "I'll be displaying you less prominently than we had discussed."
Thursday April 14,
2005
Tags brand, company name, finding a team, reputation, new stadium
Transcript
Our marketing plan was to find a sports stadium to brand with our company's name. "The hard part was finding a team so jiuced up that our reputation seemed good in comparison." "How do you feel about the new stadium name?" "Rage. Same as always."
Friday April 15,
2005
Tags five star restaurant, lunch, food so good, once in a lifetime, not invited, stay back, answer phones
Transcript
The Boss: "Carol, I decided to take the entire staff out to a five-star restaurant for lunch." "The food is so good that it's almost intoxicating. When paired with the right wine, the experience is a once-in-a-life-time sensation." "While we're gone, you'll need to answer everyone's phone."
Saturday April 16,
2005
Tags victime, identity theft, wander, strangers underpants
Transcript
The Boss: The police say I'm a victim of identity theft. The Boss: "Now I am doomed to wander the earth without knowing who I am." Dilbert: "That would mean you're wearing a stranger's underpants." The boss: "GAAA!"
Sunday April 17,
2005
Tags loopy, couldn't end story, vacation, cocnuts, rapped, round and hairy, coconut trees, brown, being chased, co worker
Transcript
"Introducing LOOPY The woman who couldn't end a story." "Did I tell you about my vacation?" Dilbert: UH- OH "We learned about coconuts." Dilbert: "I"m trapped." Loopy: "Coconuts are round and hairy, and they grow on trees." Dilbert: "Must escape." Loopy: "Coconut trees are found in many countries." Dilbert: "Must use my ejector seat." "FROOMP! HA HA!" "They're brown." "GAAA!!! She has a pursuit chair!!!" "I took lots of pictures." "Must...aim for traffic."
Monday April 18,
2005
Tags vendor, can't deliver parts, promised parts, better job, never buy
Transcript
Dilbert: Our vendors rep says they can't deliver the parts for three months. The Boss: that just means he promised the parts to some other customer who did a better job of threatening him. Dilbert: How about if I say we'll never buy from you gain? vendor: Id say you're not exactly buying form us now.
Tuesday April 19,
2005
Tags design one microchip, dozens of meetings, manager
Transcript
The boss: "All you did this quarter is design one microship." "In comparison, I found the time to attend dozens of meetings." "Now do you see what it takes to be a manager?" "Sadly, yes."
Wednesday April 20,
2005
Tags doctors offcie, exam room, toxikill, drug comapny, totally hot, side effects, what eaten, doctor, thinking of date, drug rep, hot, payoff, kick back, medical
Transcript
Doctor: You're healthy but I have to give you a prescription for tocikill. The drug company's rep is totally hot and said she'd take me to lunch if I sell enough of this stuff." Dilbert: Will there be any side effects?" " Doctor: Depends on what I eat."
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