Date Comic Strips - Page 20
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202 Results for Date
View 191 - 200 results for date comic strips. Discover the best "Date" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday February 07,
2016
Tags demands, bosses, unrealistic, frustration, outburst, catch-22, travel, air travel
Transcript
Boss: Carol, move my flight one hour earlier Friday. Carol: Do you have any idea how hard that would be? I know it sounds easy, but it won't be. Not at this late date. Not with all your pickiness. When I fail, you will think I didn't look hard enough for a new flight. I can't prove a negative, so I will forever suffer your disdain. My career is ruined. Boss: Never mind! Forget it! Why is it so hard to ask you to do anything? Carol: I've been telling people you're stupid, but I'm open to other theories.
Thursday February 18,
2016
Dilbert Thinks He Is Ready To Babysit
Tags babysitting, babysitter, inexperience, children, parents, cell phone, communication, Family, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: What's your mobile number in case I need to reach you while I"m babysitting your kids tonight? Carol: My phone is already turned off so the kids don't ruin my date night by texting every ten minutes. Dilbert: I can't tell if I'm prepared for tonight. Wally: Did you get their address?
Friday February 19,
2016
Catbert Will Not Help Children
Tags reasoning, judgment, company policy, rules, regulations, rigid, stringent, inflexible
Transcript
Dilbert: Can you give me Carol's home address? I agreed to watch her kids and she turned off her phone for her date night. Catbert: It is against company policy for me to use my good judgment to save children. Dilbert: Are you sure it says that? Catbert: Yes. I wrote it myself.
Monday February 22,
2016
Carol Berates Dilbert For Not Babysitting
Tags babysitter, children, supervision, refugees, Family
Transcript
Carol: You said you would watch my kids last night but you never showed up! Dilbert: You didn't give me your address, and you turned off your cellphone for your date night. I'm sure it was fine. Carol: An Elbonian family is living in my cupboard!!!
Wednesday April 27,
2016
Miracle Of Consciousness
Tags jaded, blase, unimpressed, dating, relationships
Transcript
Woman: Do you ever marvel at the miracle of consciousness? Dilbert: No. People are just fish plus time. Woman: Does anything amaze you? Dilbert: This is my longest date ever! 49 minutes!
Monday April 03,
2017
Alice Dates Robot
Tags dating, human resources, company policy, robot, relationships, free will, business
Transcript
Alice: Am I allowed to date a co-worker? Catbert: That's against company policy. Alice: Is our robot considered a co-worker? Catbert: No. Alice: We're good to go. Robot: Man, I wish I had free will.
Sunday January 14,
2018
Tags network, optics, stupid company, Women, imagination, flirting, miscommunication, co workers, argument, women in management, employees, business
Transcript
Carol: do you have lunch plans? Dilbert: Aren't you married? Carol: Im not asking you out on a date, Im trying to network. Dilbert: The optics wouldn't be good. Carol: How am I supposed to network in this stupid company? Dilbert: Maybe you could network with other women. Carol: This company has no women in management! Now I see the problem. Its people like you! Dilbert: Is it my imagination or was she flirting with me? Wally: I can't tell.
Wednesday July 25,
2018
Dating A Coworker
Tags dating, relationships, office policy, rules, human resources, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Can I date a co-worker? Catbert: I doubt it. You're not attractive, funny, or rich. Dilbert: I mean, is it allowed under company rules? Catbert: We only have rules about things that might happen.
Wednesday September 12,
2018
Social Media Ads To Influence
Tags Dilbert, brain-reading, computer, social media, profile, friends, testing, influence, cyborg, ridiculous, phone
Transcript
Dilbert: My brain-reading computer is checking your social media profile and finding your friends. I am now testing social media posts to see which ones influence them to recommend that to you date a cyborg. Woman: That's the most ridiculous thing I have ever. Dilbert: check your phone.
Tuesday January 01,
2019
New Year's Day
Tags holidays, new year's day, sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: Happy random calendar date. I'll be celebrating by doing nothing fun or useful all day because everything is closed. Dogbert: You could visit your mom. Dilbert: How's that different from what I just said?


