Listening Skills Comic Strips - Page 20

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211 Results for Listening Skills

View 191 - 200 results for listening skills comic strips. Discover the best "Listening Skills" comics from Dilbert.com.

Listening To A Millenial

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Listening To A Millenial - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags millennial, malaise, melancholy

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Dilbert: I didn't accomplish anything this week because I made the mistake of talking to a millennial. It sucked the ambition out of me. Now I'm nothing but an empty husk of pain and pointlessness. Boss: Walk it off. Dilbert: I need a job that pays me for listening to my favorite music.

Two Hour Summary

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Two Hour Summary - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags language, jargon, listening, communication, interpretation

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Boss: Thank you for that two-hour summary of your project. I didn't understand any of the jargon you used, but based on the context, I believe you are saying the software will be done soon. Alice: I didn't say anything about software. Boss: I guess neither of us did our best work today.

The Losing Team

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The Losing Team  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags blockchain, training, improvement, legacy, education, skills

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Dilbert: I'd like to work on our blockchain project to keep my skills updated. Boss: I need you to be a team player and maintain our legacy systems until your technical skills become obsolete. Dilbert: What kind of team is that? Boss: You'll be on the losing team.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticism, suggestion, listening, conclusions, misunderstanding

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Dilbert: Maybe you could remove a few slides to make your deck shorter. Man: So you're saying I should give up on trying to be persuasive? Dilbert: No, I"m saying it would be more persuasive if it were shorter. Man: So you're saying that having zero slides would be the most persuasive of all? Dilbert: No. I'm saying you have more slides than you need. Man: So you're saying people don't need accurate information as long as they don't have lots of slides? Dilbert:I'm not saying anything like that! Boss: Did Dilbert have any suggestions? Man: Just crazy ones.

Wally Enjoys Listening To Himself

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Wally Enjoys Listening To Himself - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Wally, talking, coffee, boring, moment

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Wally: I recently realized how much I enjoy listening to myself talk. The alternative involves listening to people who are boring and wrong about everything. Dilbert: That's not... Wally: Shhh! Don't ruin a perfect moment.

Jerry The Contract Employee

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Jerry The Contract Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags threat, Dilbert, the boss, jerry, contract, zebra, agile

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The Boss: This is Jerry the contract employee. I hired him to work on project zebra. Dilbert: We haven't even defined the project. How did you know what skills we needed? The Boss: Why are you so threatened by jerry? Jerry: He's not very agile.

Unmotivated Staff

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Unmotivated Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Catbert, the boss, wrong, leadership, skills

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The Boss: A few months ago, I realized my staff was unmotivated and working on all the wrong things. It took all of my leadership skills to get them motivated again. Catbert: Are they still doing the wrong things? The Boss: Faster than ever.

Ai Can Control Minds

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Ai Can Control Minds - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags control, intelligence, office workers, robot, technology, humans

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Man: We've developed an A.I. with such strong persuasion skills it can control human minds. Dilbert: Obviously, we have to stop the project and destroy all of the code to prevent it from spreading. Man: The A.I. says I need to ignore you.

Boss Has A Vision For The Company

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Boss Has A Vision For The Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, obliviousness, office workers, sarcasm, listen

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Boss: And that's my vision for the company. Dilbert: All you did was list the projects we are already working on while making it sound like astrology. Boss: In my defense, I didn't think any of you were listening.

Keyboard Clicks

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Keyboard Clicks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, cell phone, office, office workers

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alice: i noticed you have your keyboard click sounds activated. i've been listening to it all morning. the boss holding cell phone: i don't know how to make it stop. alice: i'll show you. frame shows outside of office building with phone being thrown out window.