Move Arms Comic Strips - Page 20
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Caption: Drug Treatment Program Counselor and Alice, whose arms are folded, sitting. Counselor says, "The first step is to admit you have a drug problem." Alice replies, "I don't." Alice continues, "My pointy-haired boss forced me to be here because he thinks it makes him look proactive." Counselor holds up an inkblotch card and says, "Hallucinations are common during withdrawal. Let's do an inkblotch test." Alice cries out, "AAAGH!!"
Wally, Carol, and Ted sitting at a table. Wally says, "Unlike you people in Marketing, I have highly sought technical skills." Carol looking at Wally while he says, "I'm too valuable to fire. So from now on, I'll deliver my project status on a balled-up piece of paper." Carol growls with her arms folded, "Grrr." Wally asks, "Is the cheerleader squad ready?" as he is about to flick a crumbled piece of paper into Ted's open arms (table hockey).
Dilbert stares at his computer screen and thinks, "I need coffee." He continues, "But I'm too tired to go get it." Dilbert leans back and thinks frantically, "I'm in a downward spiral!" Dilbert hangs limply in his chair as he thinks, "My arms go limp. The antidote is only yards away but I am immobile." Ted walks by Dilbert's cubicle as Dibert thinks, "Maybe someone will notice and bring coffee." Alice and Wally lean into Dilbert's cubicle and Dilbert thinks, "My co-workers found me. I'm saved!" Wally and Alice walk out of Dilbert's cubicle carrying his monitor and computer. Dilbert stands in front of Dogbert naked with something on his face. Dilbert explains, "As the frenzied mob ripped off my trousers, someone spilled coffee on me." Dogbert replies, "Wow, lucky."
Dilbert says, "I'll need a letter of reference to apply for a job in another division." The Boss sits at his desk and says, "No problem." The Boss writes a letter. It says, "...For a man of his hygiene. He doesn't steal as much as you think. I suspect he's on drugs." The new manager says, "And then he says you're prone to anger and denial. Is that true?" Dilbert is angry and waves his arms in the air and screams, "NO!!"
Tina the tech writer points to an open magazine on the table and says, "This article says men are paid 25% more than women. How do you explain that?" Dilbert and Wally stare. Wally picks up the magazine. The cover features a woman and the title "Estro." Wally says, "Actually, it says women make 75} for every dollar that men make. That's 33% more for men." Tina crosses her arms and frowns. Wally says, "I suppose there's almost no chance you'll praise me for my math skills right now."
At Fashion Headquarters, an ugly looking woman with short hair and fashionably outdated glasses says, "You could be our next supermodel. I love the tumor." Dogbert wags his tail and says, "It's a beauty mark." The woman says, "We prefer our supermodels to look unhealthy in a sexy way." Dogbert says, "Okay, it's a tumor." Dogbert wags his tail some more and says, "I can add a few more. It's just Silly Putty." The woman puts out her arms to stop him and says, "No, it would be easy to overdo that sort of thing."
Dogbert stands on the table and says to Ken the Skeptic, "If your controlled tests have never found psychic powers, how do you know the tests work for that sort of thing?" Ken glares and folds his arms across his chest. Dogbert says, "Isn't that like using a metal detector to find out if there are unicorns in your sock drawer?" Ken says, "No!" Later that night... Ken thinks, "A skeptic checks all the drawers." He runs a metal detector over a chest of drawers.
Dilbert waves his arms in the air and says, "I'm a little concerned about your hiring communist North Elbonian contractors to help on my top secret military project." The Boss reads a newspaper and says, "Don't worry. What's the worst thing that could happen?" Dilbert says, "I could be executed for treason." The Boss says, "Talk to our legal department." Dilbert says, Could I opt for the execution instead?"
Dilbert is at home after his date. Dogbert says, "I loved it when you hugged your date and your arm got snagged on her blouse." Dilbert looks angry. Dogbert waves his arms in the air and says, "And it was hilarious when you tried to free your arm and accidently ripped her top off." Dogbert says, "But the best part was when you yelled, 'I'm an engineer, not a diamond cutter, dang it!'" Dilbert says, "Shut up."
Dilbert meets his date. His date puts out her arms and says, "Hi, Dilbert! Hi, Dogbert!" Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh!" Dilbert's date goes in for a hug. Dilbert thinks, "She's a hugger on the first date. I never know where my arms should go." Dilbert hugs his date, his arms going down her shirt and lifting it up to her head. You can see her bra and Dilbert says, "I hope this doesn't seem awkward, but my watch is snagged on your bra strap."