Customer Comic Strips - Page 21
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Character
216 Results for Customer
View 201 - 210 results for customer comic strips. Discover the best "Customer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday December 09,
2016
Hire A Famous Cartoonist
Tags samsung, safety, explosion, battery, marketing, trust, celebrity, cartoonist, business
Transcript
Boss: We need to regain customer trust after our exploding phone fiasco. Dogbert: You need a celebrity endorsement. People trust celebrities with their life-and-death decisions. Maybe a famous cartoonist. Boss: I don't see how that could go wrong. Narrator: Continued...
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday May 17,
2017
Re Accomodation On The Flight
Tags air travel, airlines, customer service, overbooking, flight
Transcript
Flight Attendant: The flight is overbooked and our algorithm selected you for re-accommodation. Dilbert: What exactly does "re-accommodation" mean in this context? Oh.
Thursday May 18,
2017
Why Did The Algorithm Bump Dilbert
Tags airlines, air travel, flight, overbooking, customer service
Transcript
Dilbert: Why did your algorithm pick me to be bumped from the full flight? Is it because I had the lowest-cost ticket? Agent: It was that plus your lack of upper body strength.
Monday July 10,
2017
Do Whatever The Data Says
Tags study, analysis, decision, conclusions, bias, science
Transcript
Boss: I need you to do a financial analysis on upgrading our customer tracking software. Dilbert: What conclusion do you want me to reach? Boss: We'll do whatever the data says. Dilbert: Which is...? Boss: I already bought the upgrade.
Friday July 21,
2017
Make It Hard To Uninstall
Tags customer service, business strategy, sales, deception, business
Transcript
Boss: Don't focus so much on making the software do what our customers want it to do. Just make it hard for users to uninstall it. Dilbert: Why would they buy it in the first place? Boss: A big part of our strategy involves lying.
Wednesday May 09,
2018
Our Api
Tags hackers, hacking, api, jargon, obliviousness, language
Transcript
Narrator: Dogbert The Reporter. Dogbert: How did hackers get access to your customer data? CEO: I'm told they used something called "our A.P.I." to suck out all the data. Dogbert: I'll just say you'er stupid. CEO: Why does everyone always say that?
Tuesday May 08,
2018
Press Release About Hack
Tags hacker, hacking, information, privacy, damage control, apology
Transcript
Boss: Hackers got our customer data. Write a press release saying we are sorry and it will never happen again. Tina: Is any of that true? Boss: Part of it is. Tina: Which part. Boss: Hackers got our customer data.
Monday November 26,
2018
Blockchain Versus Databases
Tags boss, computers, office workers, questions
Transcript
Dilbert: And we can put the customer data on the blockchain. Alice: Why not use an immutable database instead? Dilbert: Which way should we go? Boss: Are either of them my favorite color?
Saturday December 15,
2018
Fly On Weekend
Tags boss, business, managers & supervisors, office workers, evil, cheap
Transcript
Boss: I need you to do a customer site visit. Book your flight for the weekend so you don't miss any work. Dilbert: I'm impressed by your casual evil. Boss: Bring your own food.
Thursday February 14,
2019
Small Managers
Tags boss, business, computer software, engineering, frustration, office workers, sarcasm, clients
Transcript
Boss: I told a customer we would make a small change to the software for them. Dilbert: There are no small software changes, only small managers. Boss: Dang it! Why does that sound so wise!

