Greasy Food And Ignorance Comic Strips - Page 21

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

222 Results for Greasy Food And Ignorance

View 201 - 210 results for greasy food and ignorance comic strips. Discover the best "Greasy Food And Ignorance" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert Talks Past The Sale

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert Talks Past The Sale - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #manipulation, #negotiating, #negotiation, #psychology, #guest artist, #josh shipley

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Do you want to prepare and serve my favorite food to me now or in one minute? Dilbert: Why do you always that manipulative trick of making me think past the sale? Dogbert: Because it works? Dilbert: One minute! Not a second sooner!

Deciding Which Liar You Prefer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Deciding Which Liar You Prefer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #choosing, #choices, #voting, #election, #Politics

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't decide if I want to vote for the liar with the budget plan that doesn't add up or... the other liar with a budget plan that doesn't add up. Dogbert: Have you tried using your ignorance to figure out which one is lying the least? Boss: Ooh, that could work.

Twitter The Video Game

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Twitter The Video Game - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #twitter, #social media, #game, #ignorance, #trick, #prank, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our sales dropped to zero after you offended customers on Twitter. Did someone tell you Twitter was a video game? Narrator: One week ago. Boss: And how would I kill these trolls? Wally: With your words.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #diet, #dating, #restaurant, #relationships, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: It took me six months to get a reservation here. I hear the food is amazing. Woman: It sounds fantastic. It's too bad I'm on a cucumber diet. I can only eat cucumbers after five o'clock. Dilbert: Well, it seems you have squandered my invitation to fine dining. Now my plan of sharing a culinary adventure is just a sad commentary on the casual rudeness of life. Can I expect you to complain about the quality of your cucumber and send it back? Waiter: We don't have cucumbers.

Wally Gives Approval

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Gives Approval - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #signature, #ignorance, #reading, #fine print

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need everyone's buy-in on this. Wally: Do I have to read it? Dilbert: No. Wally: That's the sort of idea I can get behind.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #listening, #small talk

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: How's work? Dilbert: Well, since you asked... it's like being trapped in a garbage compactor and no one can hear me scream. All my hopes and dreams have died, along with my immune system and my dignity. The only thing keeping me alive is that food tastes good. I tried to escape into my imagination, but I learned I don't have one. My life has no meaning. Each second is a slow-motion ordeal. Why do I get the feeling you weren't listening to any of that? Boss:My day was good too.

Wally Moves Into Bathroom Stall

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Moves Into Bathroom Stall - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #living, #home, #bathroom

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I decided to move into a bathroom stall and live there forever. The pieces all came together when I got this food delivery app. Alice: What about the ambiance? Wally: It must be hard to have high standards.

Failing The Robot Test

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Failing The Robot Test - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sentience, #robot, #human, #artificial intelligence, #turing test, #voting, #ignorance

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Can you pass the Turing test? Robot: No. Can you pass the robot test? Boss: What's the robot test? Robot: Do you vote even though you don't understand the issues? Boss: Um... I might do that. Robot: You just failed the robot test.

Wally Secret Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Secret Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #excuses, #laziness, #avoidance

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally can you review this? Wally: I'm on an urgent deadline. Boss: What is the deadline for? Wally: It's a secret project. Boss: Why don't I know about this? Wally: I don't know. I haven't studied your ignorance in that much detail.

Pictures Lie

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Pictures Lie  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #photos, #truth, #lying, #deceit, #photoshop, #public relations, #pr, #appearances

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The public doesn't believe I really helped serve food at the homeless shelter. Dogbert: Tell them pictures don't lie. CEO: Pictures lie all the time. In fact, that's the best way to lie. Dogbert: Keep that insight to yourself. CEO: I have a full head of hair on Tinder.