1997 Comic Strips - Page 21
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Character
Friday August 22,
1997
Tags ratbert, pager, vibrate, yeehaaa, no one paged, vibrating body
Transcript
Dogbert straps a pager to Ratbert's back. "Ratbert, I want you to wear this pager at all times. I'll set it to vibrate." Ratbert screams and vibrates. Dogbert says, "No one has actually paged you yet." Ratbert lies on his back on the floor and says, "It gets better?"
Saturday August 23,
1997
Tags digital pager, phone has pager, built in, dinosaur
Transcript
Ratbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Envy me, Bob. I have a digital pager and you don't." Bob says, "I don't need one. My digital PCS phone has a built in pager function." Ratbert says, "Oh, wow." Ratbert sits on the back of Dilbert chair and says, "But the worst part is that he only uses it to clean his ears." Dilbert is working on his computer, "I taught him that. The vibrating action is excellent."
Monday August 25,
1997
Tags Catbert, evil director, human resources, deadlines, embarrassing, fuzzy, laughed, embarrasing, business
Transcript
Catbert peers over the cubicle wall at Alice and says, "Alice you have to use your vacation time or you'll lose it." Alice grimaces as Catbert says, "But if you take time off, you'll miss your deadlines." Catbert laughs wickedly. Catbert walks away, his normally smooth fur is puffed out. Catbert thinks, "This is embarrassing. I laughed myself fuzzy."
Tuesday August 26,
1997
Tags work during vacation, supposed to work, concept, empathy
Transcript
Wally says to Alice, who is dressed casually and sitting at her computer, "It's a shame you have to work during your vacation. The same thing happened to me." Alice says, "Really?" Wally explains, "Actually, in my case I went on vacation when I was supposed to be working. But the concept is the same." Wally walks up to Dilbert, his clothing ripped and dishevled and a cup stuck on his face. "Apparently she wasn't looking for empathy," Wally says.
Wednesday August 27,
1997
Tags work ethic, alice, working during vacation, remain motivated, glass ceiling, never break
Transcript
Asok the intern stands behind Alice, who is dressed casually and sits at her computer. Asok says, "I admire your work ethic, Alice. You're even working during your vacation." Alice grimaces and grits her teeth. Asok continues, "It must be hard to remian motivated when you know you can never break though the glass ceiling." Alice grimaces some more. Asok's body dangles from the ceiling through a mass of tiles and wiring. Alice looks up at him and says,"So, it looks like it's just tile after all."
Thursday August 28,
1997
Tags old job, network systems, asminstrator, reckless abuse, power, new ethernet card, solve problem, big pile, office
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the couch. Dilbert eats potato chips. Dogbert announces, "I'm going back to my old job as a network systems administrator." Dilbert asks, "Why?" Dilbert offers Dogbert some chips as Dogbert says, "I'm attracted by the potential for reckless abuse of power." Asok the Intern sits at his computer and looks at Dogbert who is waving an ethernet card at him. Dogbert says, "This new ethernet card could solve your problems. Would you like a sniff before I throw it in a big pile in my office?"
Friday August 29,
1997
Tags Dogbert, network systems, software manual, manuals, mean spirirted, meet half way, door, window
Transcript
Dobert and Wally stand looking through a window in a door. Books are stacked on the other side. Dogbert says, "The software manuals are locked in this room." Dogbert continues, "I don't let users have manuals, for reasons that could only be described as mean-spirited." Wally presses himself against the glass and says, "Is there any way we can meet half-way on this?" Dogbert says, "Hey, that door didn't always have a window."
Saturday August 30,
1997
Tags dogebert, systems adminitrator, evil system, private, compiled binder, off color humor, unkind references, naughty propositions, heading, sing
Transcript
Wally sits at his computer. Dogbert says, "Wally, did you know your e-mail system isn't private?" Dogbert continues while Wally looks worried. "I've compiled a binder with all your off-color humor, unkind references to co-workers, naughty propositions, and admissions to theft." Wally asks, "Where is this heading?" Dogbert replies, "I'd like you to sing that question while hopping on one foot."
Monday September 01,
1997
Tags ignorant employees, controls information, board of directors, appointed emperor, escape key
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his computer. A voice comes from the video conferencing camera on top of the monitor. "This is Dogbert the Network Systems Administrator, to all ignorant employees." Dogbert stands in front of a computer terminal. He says, "He who controls your information, controls you. I control your information." The Boss sits at his computer. Dogbert voice says, "The board of directors has appointed me Emperor for Life. Bring the pointy-haried boss to me." The Boss furiously presses a key on his keyboard and thinks, "Uh-oh! The 'escape' key isn't working!"
Tuesday September 02,
1997
Tags Dogbert, company emperor, wheelbarrows, salary, downsized, buzz saw dogbert, parent company, money
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a filing cabinet. He wears a crown and holds a scepter. The Boss bows before him. Dogbert says, "Tell the employees to get wheelbarrows to carry my salary out." Dogbert says, "Turn out the lights when you're done. You're all downsized. Shoo!" The Boss leaves in a daze. Caption: The Media Loved Him A mob of reporters surrounds Dogbert's filing cabinet. One reporter says, "Can we call you 'Buzz Saw Dogbert'?" Dogbert says, "I bought your parent company today. You're downsized. Shoo!"

