Kept The Thought Comic Strips - Page 21

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

289 Results for Kept The Thought

View 201 - 210 results for kept the thought comic strips. Discover the best "Kept The Thought" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #inventions, #space elevator, #prototype, #roof, #pipe, #close call, #edge of building

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I finished the space elevator prototype. Boss: So soon? I thought it would take years? Wally: It's just a prototype. Do you want to try it. Boss: Sure.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mental health, #crazy thought, #witness, #conference room, #fresh heck, #sadist, #sociopath

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Wait. Hold that crazy thought. I need to get a witness in the room. Alice, would you mind coming to the conference room for a minute? Alice: What fresh heck is this? Dilbert: Larry is a sadist and a sociopath, but he hides it when there's more than one witness. So, Larry, what do you think of my project? Coworker: It looks great! I'll be happy to help you in any way I can! Alice: Am I done here? Dilbert: Don't turn your back!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #idea, #shredding gloves, #bad listener, #dumb idea

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Hold that thought until I put on my idea-shredding gloves. Dilbert: My idea is that...we...um... You're a bad listener. Alice: Tell me more about your dumb idea.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #secretaries (office), #increase work productivity, #yammering, #salted earth, #great plan

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I just thought of a great idea for increasing workplace productivity. Carol: Does it involve standing near my workplace and yammering while I try to work? Boss: Geez. Who salted the Earth? Carol: Your plan is going great so far.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business failures/bankruptcies, #stock market, #innovative pordcuts, #in pipeline, #r&d budget, #firings, #sexy startup, #work smarter, #ironic, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our stock is down 49% and we have no innovative products in the pipeline. CEO: Slash the R&D budget, fire 9,000 employees, and buy a sexy start-up company that we can run into the ground. Boss: We did all of that last year. CEO: Did I already tell the employees to work smarter? Boss: Yes. They thought you were being ironic.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dieting & weight control, #interviews, #tattoos & body marking, #job interview, #face tattoo, #overeating, #bad idea, #people can see, #dont interview well

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you ever think that getting that face tattoo might be a bad career move? Interviewee: No. Was there ever a time you thought overeating was a bad idea? Because people can see that. Boss: You don't interview well. Job interview

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #consensus, #display leadership, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: See if you can get consensus on your idea and get back to me. Dilbert: Or you could display some leadership and get back to me. Boss: I'm leading you right now. Dilbert: Really? I thought it would feel different.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interviews, #job hopper, #more passive, #stereo typing

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your work history suggests that you might be a job-hopper. Interviewee: Oh, really? Well, I should hop all over you for saying that! Boss: I thought you would be more passive. Interviewee: Wow. You cannot stop stereotyping.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #online (web) news, #news manufaturer, #online media, #misleading headlines, #snarky bow, #news naturally, #engineer, #news magic, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I got a job as a news manufacturer for an online media company. I quote people out of context, add misleading headlines and tie it all up with a snarky bow. Dilbert: I thought the news occurred naturally. Dogbert: "Entineer Thinks News is Magic."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #coaching, #hand off colon, #managers & supervisors, #mentoring, #micromanging, #obliviousness, #puppet, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Please stop micromanaging me. Boss: What? I thought I was coaching and mentoring. Do you want some coaching and mentoring? Carol: I'm not a puppet. Keep your hand out of my colon.