Long Nose Comic Strips - Page 21

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434 Results for Long Nose

View 201 - 210 results for long nose comic strips. Discover the best "Long Nose" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags finalized busdget, budget for last year, sounds annual

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Man: "At long last, I finalized the budget." Dilbert: "This is the budget for last year." Man: "Stop making it sound annual."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Wally, downsized candidate, alice glad, boss thanks wally, ride to church, on good side

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alice: "Wally, I'm glad we work in the same department." "Because your performance is so bad that you'll be downsized first." "You're like a buffer. As long as you're still here, my job is safe." "And there's nothing you can do to change the situation." The Boss: "Wally, do you mind giving my family a ride to church again this week?" Wally: "No problem." The Boss: "It's nice that you joined my church even though you live an hour away." "And I wouldn't say no to those tasty bagels you always bring for the ride." Alice: "GAAA!!!" The Boss: "Oh... I didn't see you sneak up on me, Heathen.. I mean Alice."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags retired, do anything, all day long, banging head, earn money, social infrastructure, warm, tingly, sensation, guilty

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Dogbert: "It's nice to be retired. I'll do a-a-anything I want to do all day long." "I guess you'll be banging your head against a wall today, trying to earn money for the social infrastructure." Dilbert: "Do you ever feel guilty?" Dogbert: "Is it a warm, tingly sensation that makes you wag?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags career day, questions, careers, connected dots, generational

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Career Day The Boss: ...and thats why you should have a pre meeting before every meeting. any questions? Girl: how long will my generation need to work? The Boss: Sixty years. I see that you've connected the dots.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sales drop, invent something, everyone wants, visionary leadership, demands of boss, unreasonable demands on staff, money making, shortfalls

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The boss: Sales are dropping like a rock. Our plan is to invent some sort of doohickey that everyone wants to buy. The visionary leadership work is done, How long will your part take.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags extreme makeover, buisness, Dogbert, rework a face, plastic surgery, scary, human makeover, ears, antlers

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Dogbert: "I'm going into the extreme makeover business." "I'm planning to take it to the next level." "You'd look good with antlers." "And the nose has to go." Man: "Go?" "Your tiny ears are out of proportion." "These are ears." "I'll also rearrange your fat so you can't see it." "I'll toss in a few extras after you're unconscious, no charge." "Guess how old I am."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags attend meeting, mandatory meeting, meeting mandatory, approval, bending rules, handed out cash

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"Can I talk to you after the mandatory meeting?" "Whoa! Whoa! I didn't give you approval to attend that meeting." "The meeting is mandatory." "Approval is mandatory too." "Okay, whatever." "May I go to the mandatory meeting?" "All requests must be in writing." "It's mandatory!!! Man-duh-tory!!!" "If people start bending the rules, before long, murder will be legal." "That was the finest mandatory meeting I've ever attended! They handed out cash!" "Shut up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags stalk, new hire, romance, plan b, demented, Men

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wally: "I'm bored. It's time to stalk the new hire." "How long is the wait?" "About forty-five minutes." "When romance is involved, it's good to have a plan 'B.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags more time, no shaving, all forms of hygiene, unwashed telecommunting, clown shoes, long toe nails

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"I save so much time by not shaving that Im considering giving up all forms of hygiene." "I'd phase into it by having a few unwashed telecommuting days per week." "And if you wear clown shoes, you never need to clip your toenails." "I should be writing this down."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mullet head, nickname, everyine call, behind back, secret nick name, long in back

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carol: "Hey, mullet-head, this is for you." "What did you call me?" "Oops. I used the secret nickname that everyone in the office has for you." "My work here is done." "It's just a little long in the back!"