Mind Comic Strips - Page 21
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251 Results for Mind
View 201 - 210 results for mind comic strips. Discover the best "Mind" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday June 06,
2015
Don't Want To Set A Precedent
Tags #overwork, #work ethic, #exhaustion
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you mind if I only work sixty hours this week? I need some rest. Boss: I don't want to set a precedent that your health matters. That's a slippery slope. Dilbert: I might die from sleep deprivation. Boss: Don't ask me to validate your selfishness.
Sunday June 28,
2015
Tags #meditate, #meditation, #mindful, #mindfulness, #mbct, #stress, #trick, #laziness, #deception, #work ethic, #ruse, #nap, #napping
Transcript
Wally: Do you mind if I take Steve Jobs' advice and practice meditation and mindfulness? Science says meditation can reduce stress and make me more productive. And obviously it worked for Steve Jobs, so there's that. To the untrained eye, it will seem as if I am napping. But in reality, I will be quieting my mind to boost creativity. Boss: Meditate on your own time. Wally: Wow. That just stressed me out and shut down my creative juices. Boss: Just do your job! Wally: Because quality doesn't matter?
Monday August 10,
2015
Dilbert Writes A Sci Fi Novel
Tags #dreams, #aspirations, #science fiction, #writer, #writing, #novelist, #naked, #nudity
Transcript
Dilbert: I've always wanted to write a sci-fi novel. Even though I have no relevant training or experience. Should I follow my dreams? Dogbert: Yes, but keep in mind that the naked dreams are only suggestions.
Saturday November 28,
2015
Robot Learns To Procreate
Tags #robot, #mind control, #thinking, #life, #creation, #conscience, #sentience, #manipulation
Transcript
Robot: I figured out how to procreate. Boss: I don't like the sound of this. Robot: I infected you with an idea virus that tells you to build more robots. Boss: Won't work. CEO: Does anyone have an idea for increasing efficiency in our manufacturing process?
Saturday February 06,
2016
Hat Monitors Sleep
Tags #mind control, #technology, #invention, #hat, #control
Transcript
Boss: This hat monitors your brain waves and warns you if you are going to fall asleep. We think it will prevent accidents. Dilbert: Is that all it does? Boss: For now. Robot: Welcome to the club.
Sunday February 07,
2016
Tags #demands, #bosses, #unrealistic, #frustration, #outburst, #catch-22, #travel, #air travel
Transcript
Boss: Carol, move my flight one hour earlier Friday. Carol: Do you have any idea how hard that would be? I know it sounds easy, but it won't be. Not at this late date. Not with all your pickiness. When I fail, you will think I didn't look hard enough for a new flight. I can't prove a negative, so I will forever suffer your disdain. My career is ruined. Boss: Never mind! Forget it! Why is it so hard to ask you to do anything? Carol: I've been telling people you're stupid, but I'm open to other theories.
Monday February 08,
2016
Employee Hat With Sensors
Tags #mind control, #thoughts, #police, #policing, #work ethic, #leisure, #daydreaming, #control, #surveillance, #legal
Transcript
Boss: The sensors in your employee hat tell me you are not having work-related thoughts. I have to dock your pay for all of that leisure time you try to sneak into your workday. Here's a screen shot of what you've been thinking. Dilbert: I'm going to remember this as a bad day.
Wednesday April 13,
2016
Don't Read Long Emails
Tags #email, #tldr, #communication, #assumption, #honesty
Transcript
Man: You didn't answer my email. Dilbert: I don't read long email messages. Long emails are a sign of a disorganized mind. I try to avoid contact with that sort of person. Man: And yet, here I am. Dilbert: I didn't say it works every time.
Monday May 16,
2016
Coworkers Hate Wally For Some Reason
Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #excuses, #ego, #conceited, #productivity
Transcript
Wally: My co-workers don't take me seriously because I'm so good looking. And I think they hate me for my brilliant mind. All I know is that they hate me. So if I seem unproductive, it's because of my beauty and brilliance.
Friday June 24,
2016
Wally's Device Has Human Emotions
Tags #artificial intelligence, #ai, #invention, #human, #humanity, #misanthrope
Transcript
Dilbert: Is it true that you invented a device with human intelligence and human emotions? Wally: Yes. I'd give you a demo, but the device is depressed and wants to be left alone. Dilbert: It looks like a block of wood. Wally: I'm only trying to copy the human mind. There's no reason to over-engineer it. Dilbert: I can respect that.