Talk Comic Strips - Page 21
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Character
368 Results for Talk
View 201 - 210 results for talk comic strips. Discover the best "Talk" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday April 16,
2009
Tags future, prediction, bleak, scary
Transcript
Company Economist Man says, "In 2010 the economy will collapse and the world will plunge into darkness." Man says, "You will all be eaten by cannibals who will, in turn, die from the diseases that riddle your bodies." The boss says, "Please never talk again." Man says, "I get that a lot lately."
Tuesday May 26,
2009
Tags excuses, lying down, table, reading, agenda, sleeping, lazy
Transcript
Wally says, "Agenda items four through seven don't involve me." Wally says, "I'll use that time to take a refreshing table nap. Experts say it's good for productivity." The boss says, "I need to talk to those experts." Zzzzzzz
Wednesday August 05,
2009
Tags trouble, customer, directions, annoyed, ashamed
Transcript
Woman says, "Hey, engineer, can I ask you a question?" Dilbert says, "I'm not allowed to talk to customers. We believe that honesty impedes sales." Woman says, "I think you just impeded." Dilbert says, "Oops."
Thursday August 06,
2009
Tags yelling, angry, annoyed, ridiculous, suggestion
Transcript
The boss says, "Did you tell a customer that you're not allowed to talk to customers?" Dilbert says, "Yes." The boss says, "You fool! That makes us look lame!" Dilbert says, "What was I supposed to do when she asked me a question?" The boss says, "Did you have access to scissors?"
Thursday October 08,
2009
Tags career, mean, plans, murder, nervous, misunderstanding, hatred
Transcript
The Boss says, "Carol, I'd like to talk to you about your career goals." Carol says, "My career goal is to take over the department by tricking you into a fatal accident, then telling everyone you're just working from home." The boss says, "That's not right." Carol says, "So you're saying I should set my goals low?"
Wednesday November 18,
2009
Tags asking, assignment, project, criticism, annoyed, ridicule, stupidity, unproductive, inefficient
Transcript
The Boss says, "Let's implement cloud computing so I have something to talk about at the executive meeting." Dilbert says, "Tell them we're evaluating it. That way neither of us needs to do any real work." The Boss says, "I like it when you do real work." Dilbert says, "Sorry. I thought you were leading by example."
Friday November 27,
2009
Tags meeting, complaining, stupidity, confused, coworker, leaving, business
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I didn't understand anything you said for the past half an hour." Dilbert says, "You shushed me every time I tried to interrupt with a question." Dilbert says, "Now we're out of time, and my only memory of this meeting is that noise came out of your donut hole." Woman says, "This is why I don't let you talk."
Friday December 25,
2009
Tags christmas, presents, giving, nerdy, Funny, coffee, bank, bathrobe, holiday
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Merry Christmas. Here?s a hundred bucks." Dogbert says, "And here's a hundred bucks for you." Dilbert says, "We could save another step by setting up an electronic transfer with an annual recurring option." Dogbert says, "Excellent." Dogbert says, "Or we could not give gifts." Dilbert says, "Hush your crazy talk."
Tuesday December 29,
2009
Tags communicating, stress, infuriating, impossible, answering, convoluted
Transcript
Morgan: The man with no communication skills Dilbert says, "Did you get results from the stress tests yet?" Morgan says, "Stress tests have to be performed under controlled conditions." Dilbert says, "Has anyone ever explained to you the yes-no form of questions?" Morgan says, "Is it my turn to talk?"
Monday March 22,
2010
Tags cell phone, invention, old man's head, face front, shoulder, talk, creepy, lightbulb, edison, technology
Transcript
Dilbert says, "It's a cell phone shaped like an old man's head." Dilbert says, "It sits on your shoulder so you don't look as if you're talking to yourself." Dilbert says, "People probably told Edison that his lightbulb was creepy too."


